Latest Quotes Page 1 of 666

Quote from Raj in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Raj: Oh, this is amazing. I wish I had a playhouse like this when I was a kid.
Penny: Really? You never had a playhouse?
Raj: No. I mean, my dad did buy the house next door for us to play in.

Quote from Howard in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Howard: I'm gonna hook up the garden hose, so it has running water.
Amy: Why does it need running water?
Howard: Same reason it's got electricity: Bernadette and I both work, and we're overcompensating.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Sheldon: This reminds me of a traditional Amish barn raising. With everyone pitching in.
Howard: How exactly are you pitching in?
Sheldon: I don't hear anyone else giving facts about traditional Amish barn raising.
Leonard: The rest of us are pitching in with hammers and nails.
Sheldon: Well, facts are my nails, and my voice is the hammer which pounds them through the wood of your skull.
Penny: Well, that is how it feels.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Raj: Hey, uh, can you pass me that drill?
Sheldon: Yeah, fun fact about Amish barn raising, they don't use any power tools.
Penny: Amy, make him stop.
Amy: No. If he tires himself out now, he'll sleep better tonight.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Bernadette: Hey, Howie, can you give me a hand? I need to get some work done, and the kids are climbing all over me.
Raj: You know what? I'll watch them.
Bernadette: You sure?
Sheldon: But I was just about to tell everyone why they're called Pennsylvania Dutch when they really hail from Germany.
Raj: Yep.

Quote from Howard in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Howard: So, what do you think? Pretty cool, huh? And when our kids outgrow it, we can Airbnb it to other people's babies.
Bernadette: Funny.
Howard: You all right? Sorry, I haven't had a second to myself. So let me just go back inside, finish my report, brush my teeth, change out of my pajamas, make a sandwich, and then I'll come out here and laugh at your joke.
Howard: Ooh. As long as you're making sandwiches- You can laugh at that one later, too.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Sheldon: All right, I've kept you in suspense long enough. "Dutch" is a bastardization of the word "Deutsch," meaning German.
Penny: What's German for "annoying"?
Sheldon: Nervig. Why do you ask?

Quote from Leonard in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Leonard: President Siebert, you wanted to see me?
President Siebert: Hey. There's my guy!
Leonard: You sound like my wife just before she asked me to go to Coachella.
President Siebert: No, this is gonna be way more fun than Coachella.
Leonard: More fun than heatstroke? Good luck.

Quote from the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

President Siebert: So, there are some funds left in the general administrative grant, and I need somebody to decide how we should disburse them.
Leonard: Really? Wow, what an honor. Thank you. So how do I decide who gets the money?
President Siebert: How do you decide anything? Think about it with your brain, and then say it with your mouth.

Quote from the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Leonard: Uh, so, after I decide, do I then submit it to you for approval, or?
President Siebert: No. You decide, you approve, and then you pride yourself on a job well done.
Leonard: That's a lot of responsibility.
President Siebert: Well, if I didn't think you were up to the task, you wouldn't have been fifth on my list.

Quote from the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Leonard: Thank you. I'll get started right away.
President Siebert: And I look forward to hearing nothing about it.
Leonard: I will keep you posted.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Howard: Hey, thank you guys again for helping out yesterday.
Raj: No problem. That was really fun.
Sheldon: It was fun. But I am sore.
Howard: You didn't lift a finger.
Sheldon: No, but I narrated the entire event, and I am paying for it today.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Leonard: Gentlemen.
Raj: Hey.
Sheldon: Hi.
Howard: Leonard, do I detect a little swagger in your step?
Leonard: Mm, possibly.
Sheldon: Well, stop. It doesn't suit you.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Leonard: Well, Siebert put me in charge of handing out the last bit of the administrative funds, and I have sole discretion.
Raj: Ooh! Looks like Christmas came early. First thing on my list is a golden umbrella, 'cause Leonard's gonna make it rain!

Quote from Howard in the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Leonard: Uh, hold on, I'm not just gonna hand out money. There's a procedure you need to follow.
Sheldon: I believe he's referring to the traditional "kissing of the buttocks."
Howard: Should we form a line, or just do it like we're bobbing for apples?

Showing quotes 1 to 15 of 9,980