Latest Quotes Page 391 of 574
Bernadette: Oh, God, you're right. I took our love and threw it under his bus-sized mother.
Leonard: Well, they don't have an Excalibur here, so what do you want to do?
Sheldon: Mm. Tough decision. There's no weaponry from Lord of the Rings, forged in a Chinese sweatshop?
Leonard: Just Bilbo Baggins' sword over there.
Sheldon: Two grown men with a hobbit's dagger; wouldn't we look silly?
Stuart: Oh, I see you guys have found my little treasure.
Leonard: Yeah. It's okay, I guess.
Sheldon: Okay? It's magnificent.
Leonard: Buh-buh-buh-buh! What do you want for it?
Stuart: Oh, it's hard to put a price on something thats a copy of something that was on pay cable. But for my friends, let's say 250?
Leonard: Oh, that's pretty steep.
Stuart: Well, it's a limited edition. They only made 8,000 of these bad boys.
Sheldon: Only 8,000? We're wasting precious time. Buy it.
Leonard: Hang on. Can you do any better?
Stuart: Are you kidding? I'm already giving you the friends and family discount.
Sheldon: Oh, did you hear that? We're getting the friends and family discount. We are honored and we will take it.
Leonard: Two hundred.
Stuart: Man, you're killing me!
Sheldon: Killing you? I can't breathe.
Stuart: Two ten, and I'm losing money.
Sheldon: Oh, now, we can't let him lose money, Leonard. I'm so sorry.
Leonard: Two ten and you throw in the Iron Man helmet.
Stuart: Are you crazy? That helmet's signed by Robert Downey Jr.
Stuart: Okay, if you're going to question the importance of an actor's signature on a plastic helmet from a movie based on a comic book, then all of our lives have no meaning!
Leonard: Okay, fine. Just the sword, two ten.
Stuart: Thank you. I can eat meat this week.
Stuart: You want me to wrap it?
Leonard: No, it's okay. I'm gonna stab my friend in the chest.
Sheldon: Hello, Wil Wheaton.
Wil Wheaton: Hi, Sheldon. Nice sword.
Sheldon: It's part of my sword collection. Do you have a sword collection?
Wil Wheaton: No.
Sheldon: I'm not surprised.
Stuart: Here's the Batman 612 with the Jim Lee alternate cover that you wanted.
Wil Wheaton: Awesome. What do I owe you?
Stuart: Forty bucks.
Wil Wheaton: Good deal.
Sheldon: Sucker. Didn't even ask for the friends and family discount.
Wil: Hey, I'm having a party at my house on Friday, and I was hoping you would stop by.
Stuart: Will there be girls there?
Wil: Yeah, of course.
Stuart: 'cause there wasn't last time.
Wil: There will be girls.
Sheldon: I see what you're doing. You accept an invitation to a party at the home of my sworn enemy, he tells everyone we're going to be there, and when we don't show, he looks the fool. Fiendishly clever.
Leonard: I was actually thinking about going.
Sheldon: And then declaring the party a fiasco and storming out, leaving him humiliated in front of his guests. Love it.
Leonard: No, I was gonna grab Raj and Howard and have a good time.
Stuart: Oh, great, more guys. It's gonna be another Wil Wheaton sausage-fest.
Leonard: Sheldon, can you grab me a water?
Leonard: Can you or can't you?
Sheldon: It's not that simple, Leonard.
Leonard: It never is, is it?
Leonard: Got it. Can I have my water?
Sheldon: Of course. (Knocking Leonard's bottle of water away) Now get it yourself, you traitor.
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