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Leonard: But look, Penny's home. Why don't we just call her, have her go in the apartment, get your flash drive and e-mail you the paper?
Sheldon: But the flash drive is in a locked drawer in my desk.
Sheldon: The key is hidden in my room.
Sheldon: Penny would have to go into my room.
Sheldon: People don't go in my room!
Raj: It's hot in here. It must be Summer.
Summer Glau: That's cute.
Raj: Really? I just made it up. Have you seen Slumdog Millionaire?
Summer Glau: Oh, yeah, I loved it.
Raj: It's loosely based on my life.
Penny: The theater is above a bowling alley, so it's a little noisy, but it might be the only chance I'll ever get to play Anne Frank. And the director is brilliant. He uses the bowling sounds as, like, Nazi artillery.
Sheldon: Okay, step four. Do you see that small plastic case on my dresser?
Penny: Your dresser? Who is this?
Sheldon: It's Sheldon.
Penny: Oh, hey, Sheldon! How is San Francisco?
Sheldon: I'm not in San Francisco. I'm on a train. Were you even listening to me?
Penny: Uh, no, I was talking to my friend, but what's up?
Sheldon: What's up? I'll tell you whats up. I'm in a crisis situation, and I need you to marshal your powers of concentration, limited as they may be-
Leonard: He's calling to ask you a favor. You might be confused because he didn't use the words, Penny, Sheldon, please or favor.
Raj: And that bright little star peeking her head out early today, that's Venus.
Summer Glau: That is so cool. You really know a lot about space.
Raj: Come on. When you were on TV in Firefly, you were actually in space.
Summer Glau: You're not one of those guys who really believe that, are you?
Raj: You mean one of the hopeless geeks? No. Those are crazy people. Howard, be a dear and get me another one of these. Now, him, he's one of those geeks.
Sheldon: All right, now, before you enter my bedroom unescorted, I need you to understand that this onetime grant of access does not create a permanent easement. ... Easement. It's a legal right of access. ... Good grief. What? No, don't put me on hold. Aw.
Howard: Do you believe him? Normally around women, he has the personality of a boiled potato. Put one beer in him, and he's M. Night Charmalarmalon.
Leonard: Is that what he's drinking? It's not even real beer.
Leonard: Look at it. Non-alcoholic beer.
Howard: What's going on?
Leonard: I don't know. Some sort of placebo effect, I guess.
Howard: Placebo, you say. Interesting.
Sheldon: Yes, I'm still here. Where am I going? I'm on a train. Now, what you'll be looking for is a small wooden box located between a Hoberman's sphere and a sample of quartz flecked with pyrite. Hoberman's Sphere. It's a collapsible icosidodecahedron. No, the thing with the time on it is my alarm clock.
Raj: Actually, in India, the names of constellations are different. Where you have the Big Dipper, we have the Big Curry Pot.
Summer Glau: You're making that up.
Raj: You got me. Now what are you going to do with me?
Howard: Hi, I'm the small package good things come in.
Leonard: Hey, Penny. It's Leonard.
Penny: Hey, Leonard. How's the train ride?
Leonard: Delightful. Listen, I don't know what you're doing right now, but there are little bubbles forming on the corners of Sheldon's mouth.
Howard: And did you know the word "pumpernickel" comes from the German words pumper and nickel, which loosely translates to fart goblin?
Sheldon: You're holding a Japanese puzzle box, which takes ten precise moves to open. First, locate the panel with the diamond pattern and slide the centre portion one millimetre to the left. Then, on the opposite end of the box, slide the entire panel down two millimetres. You'll hear a slight click.
Penny: Hang on. Sheldon, do you have any emotional attachment to this box?
Sheldon: No, it's a novelty I ordered off the Internet. Now, did you hear the click?
Penny: Not yet. (Puts the box on the ground and stomps on it)There it is.
Sheldon: So, I'm thinking, you won the Nobel Prize what, three years ago? So you must deal with a whole lot of what has Smoot done lately? My thought is we continue my research as a team, you know, Cooper-Smoot, alphabetical, and when we win the Nobel Prize, you'll be back on top.
George Smoot: With all due respect, Dr. Cooper, are you on crack?
Sheldon: Fine! Smoot-Cooper. Wow, what a diva.
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