Bernadette: Howard Joel Wolowitz, you get back here.
Howard: *quietly* Never should have told you my middle name.

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Josh: So, I have to ask, was the robot sexy?
Howard: It was actually just a mechanical hand.
Josh: 'Cause that's all you need, right?
Howard: You are my brother.

Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not cry.
Howard: That's true, you'd rust.

Leonard: What am I supposed to do?
Penny: Err, keep your mouth off other women.

Penny: Wait, what is wrong with you two? He was talking about television during their date night.
Sheldon: Oh, not just date night. Our 5th anniversary.
Penny: Okay, see, that's even dumber than you wondering if being bitten by a goat would give you the powers of a goat.
Sheldon: If that happens, don't make me wait ten years to watch you eat a tin can.

Sheldon: Amy's mad at me, and I'm not clear why.
Penny: Okay, were you talking before she got upset?
Sheldon: Yes.
Penny: That's probably it.