Sheldon: One vintage Mr. Mxyzptlk action figure. That's Leonard's.
Amy: (writing down) Children's toy.
Sheldon: One Star Trek: The Next Generation phaser. That's Leonard's.
Amy: (writing down) Children's toy.

Amy: Okay, what is going on?
Penny: We just want you to be prepared for any surprises that could happen tomorrow.
Amy: What surprises?
Bernadette: We don't want to spoil anything, but you should know that Sheldon said he's ready to be physical.
Amy: You shut your damn mouth! You actually heard him say this?
Penny: Yes, he said he wants to do something to show you how much you mean to him.
Amy: I can't believe it. I don't know what to say.
Bernadette: Well, we're really happy for you and we know how much-
Amy: I do know what to say. Let's get me waxed!

Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not get lucky.
Amy: You and me both, brother.

Amy: Do you have any idea how hard it is to laugh at a knock knock joke that starts "Knock Knock Knock, Amy. Knock Knock Knock, Amy. Knock Knock Knock, Amy"?

Howard: If you don't leave now, she'll use food and guilt to keep you there the rest of your life.

Howard: Honestly, if I could bend that far what would I need with you.
Bernadette: If you could bend that far, you'd be doing both of us a favor.

Mrs. Wolowitz Oh please. You're a tall glass of brown water. Have dessert.