Raj: (In a sing-songy fashion) You see, I was at the doctor's office, the folder was right there, so I took a peek.
Howard: (Imitating Koothrappali) And talking like this doesn't make it less creepy.

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Bernadette: Maybe we should get one of those machines to help her up the stairs.
Howard: You mean a forklift?

Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not cry.
Howard: That's true, you'd rust.

Amy: What is this?
Sheldon: A functional MRI of my brain. I did Sudoku before they took it so I'd be ripped.
Amy: I love it. Thank you.
Sheldon: And it's not just an MRI. The orbitofrontal cortex is lit up because I was thinking of you.

Penny: Howard and Bernadette's kid might be born on your birthday. How cool is that?
Amy: Yeah, but I thought this baby was supposed to ruin their sex life, not mine.

Raj: Don't come to the hospital. We're headed home.
Penny: Oh, that was fast. Did she sneeze the baby out?