Leonard: Here's the hotel room we all share.
Penny: Well, you and I would get our own room, right?
Leonard: Every hotel is booked. But, yeah, see this space here between Sheldon's feet and my head? That's where you go.
Penny: Well, it's no different than when Sheldon used to climb in bed with us during a thunderstorm.

Leonard: What am I supposed to do?
Penny: Err, keep your mouth off other women.

Penny: At one point, they had me figure out how to get a banana out of a puzzle box.
Leonard: Wait, Sheldon gave me a banana in a box. He was testing me, too.
Penny: Unbelievable.
Leonard: And how could a chimp even solve that? That was impossible.
Penny: Really? You couldn't get it out?

Sheldon: Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken.
Penny: Yeah, well your Ken can kiss my Barbie.

Penny: So, do you want to come?
Amy: No, thanks. I already live in a place all the nerds come to.

Raj: Oh, Double Stuf Oreos, I remember when I could afford you.

Sheldon: He also has a remarkable amount of credit card debt.
Howard: I thought your dad paid your cards.
Raj: I have a card for emergencies that I pay for myself.
Sheldon: What emergency happened at the L.A. Zoo?
Raj: That's a penguin I sponsor. They're losing their homes to global warming, and my car gets, like, seven miles a gallon, so I felt bad.