Howard: Is she single?
Bernadette: I'm not setting her up with Raj.
Howard: What about Stuart?
Bernadette: Are you listening? I want her to think I'm not mean.
Howard: Okay. Well, it's just we have two single friends.
Bernadette: Howie, I just met this woman. Why don't I wait a little and get to know her? Maybe I won't like her, and then I'd be happy to ruin her life with Stuart or Raj.
Howard: That's all I ask.

Bernadette: You better find my husband's mother, 'cause one way or another we're walking out of this airport with a dead woman.

Howard: I'm sorry I didn't take you to the airport. I just want you to know I'll never forgive myself for being so selfish. And I promise to keep you close for the rest of my life.
Bernadette: Oh, no, that thing's gonna end up in my bedroom.

Bernadette: Gosh, Amy. I'm sensing a little hostility. Is it maybe because like Sheldon's work, your sex life is also theoretical?

Bernadette: One of the great things about being pregnant is drinking cranberry juice out of a wineglass and watching people freak out.

Sheldon: I call this meeting of the Council of Sheldons to order. Let's take roll. Science Sheldon?
Science Sheldon: Present.
Sheldon: Texas Sheldon?
Texas Sheldon: Howdy.
Sheldon: Fanboy Sheldon?
Fanboy Sheldon: Greetings.
Sheldon: Germaphobe Sheldon?
Germaphobe Sheldon: Say it, don't spray it.
Humorous Sheldon: Where's Jock Sheldon?
Sheldon: Not the time, Humorous Sheldon!

Sheldon: Why can't there just be one week each month for famous people to die?
Amy: Well, they've already arranged to die in threes. What more do you want from them?