Big Bang Theory Quote 9401

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Irish Pub Formulation

Leonard: My point is, Priya's gone. And it would be much better if no-one else found out about this.
Sheldon: You mean, you want me to keep a secret?
Leonard: Yes.
Sheldon: You know I can't keep a secret.
Leonard: You can if you try. Think about it this way, if I were Batman and you were Alfred, you'd keep that secret. Right?
Sheldon: Why do you get to be Batman?
Leonard: Because, well, Batman has the secret.
Sheldon: Well Alfred has secrets too.
Leonard: Like what?
Sheldon: Alfred knows that Barbara Gordon is Batgirl. Which I've now just told to Batman. See, I can't keep a secret.


Sheldon Quotes

Quote from the episode The Jiminy Conjecture

Raj: I don't like bugs, okay. They freak me out.
Sheldon: Interesting. You're afraid of insects and women. Ladybugs must render you catatonic.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Sheldon: Scissors cuts paper, paper covers rock, rock crushes lizard, lizard poisons Spock, Spock smashes scissors, scissors decapitates lizard, lizard eats paper, paper disproves Spock, Spock vaporizes rock, and as it always has, rock crushes scissors.

Quote from the episode The Gorilla Experiment

Sheldon: Why are you crying?
Penny: Because I'm stupid.
Sheldon: That's no reason to cry. One cries because one is sad. For example, I cry because others are stupid, and that makes me sad.

'The Irish Pub Formulation' Quotes

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: I'm sorry.
Raj's sister: Why do you say that?
Leonard: When I'm in bed with a girl, that's just my natural response.

Quote from Sheldon

Raj: Hands off my sister.
Sheldon: Why would I touch your sister? She's all covered in airplane germs.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: And to think, I was about to waste the last of my good haemorrhoid cream on you.