Sheldon: Get back here, you stupid bird, so I can love you.

Stuart: Can I help you find anything?
Amy: A comic that doesn't depict a woman whose bosom can be used as a flotation device.

Penny: Wait, what is going on?
Sheldon: In case you have forgotten, Schrodinger's cat is a thought experiment.
Penny: No, no, no, no, I didn't forget. Um, there's this cat in a box and until you open it, it's either dead or alive or both. Although, back in Nebraska, our cat got stuck in my brother's camp trunk, and we did not need to open it to know there was all kinds of dead cat in there.
Amy: Homespun stories, knowledge of physics and a bosom that defies it. You're the whole package, aren't you?

Bernadette: Good Morning, handsome.
Howard: Good morning, mom.
Bernadette: It's me!

Sheldon: Hard as this may be to believe, it's possible that I'm not boyfriend material.
Leonard: Glad I was sitting down for that.

Sheldon: I got a splinter.
Amy: What do you want me to do about it?
Sheldon: Relationship Agreement - Section 4: Boo-boos and Ouchies. You have to take care of it.
Amy: I should've gotten a lawyer.

Leonard: You went to the comic book store by yourself?
Penny: Yeah, it was fun. I walked in and two different guys got asthma attacks. It felt pretty good.

Sheldon: I thought where you come from they don't have emotions.
Spock Doll: I come from a factory in Taiwan.

Raj: They don't call me Brown Dynamite for nothin'.

Amy: I have a sorta kinda boyfriend at home playing with a model train, but you don't hear me bitching about it.

Penny: What's up, buttercup?

Astronaut Mike Massimino: No problem, Froot Loops.

Amy: I'll let you in on a little secret. Originally, we were painted nude. But I had him add clothes cause I thought it was an unnecessary challenge to our heterosexuality.
Penny: Yeah, good call.
Amy: But, if you ever change your mind, all it would take is some warm, soapy water and a couple of sponges.
Penny: You're talking about the painting, right?
Amy: Sure.

Sheldon: You can lead a chicken to crisco, but you can't make your mother fry it.

Sheldon: Does anybody have any wood? Oh, come on! I just want wood. Why are you making it so hard?