Popular Quotes Page 3 of 651

Quote from Leonard in the episode The Fortification Implementation

Leonard: Hang on, if you're making all this money, where is it?
Penny: In a safe place.
Leonard: What does that mean, under your bed?
Penny: No, it means a diversified portfolio of stocks and bonds. I'm not overly conservative. I'm young, so my guy said I can afford to take some risks.
Leonard: Wait a minute, you have "a guy"?
Penny: Don't you have a guy?
Leonard: Why would I have a guy?! I don't have any money!

Quote from Penny in the episode The Cooper Extraction

Raj: (To Amy) If you were having Sheldon's baby, would you really want him in the room?
Penny: Yeah, if he's in the room when they're making the baby, I'll give you $10.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Focus Attenuation

Sheldon: I know the real reason you never made progress with that idea. You thought of it September 22nd, 2007. Two days later, Penny moved in and so much blood rushed to your genitals, your brain became a ghost town.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Commitment Determination

Sheldon: Amy's mad at me, and I'm not clear why.
Penny: Okay, were you talking before she got upset?
Sheldon: Yes.
Penny: That's probably it.

Quote from Bernadette in the episode The Intimacy Acceleration

Bernadette: You better find my husband's mother, 'cause one way or another we're walking out of this airport with a dead woman.

Quote from Bernadette in the episode The Prom Equivalency

Stuart: Oh, so she's good enough for Howard but not for me?
Howard: Yeah.
Bernadette: Yeah. Go have weird relationships with your own mother and cousin. This is his turf.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Santa Simulation

Raj: Doesn't anyone have a rod of resurrection? Because if you've got one, I need it bad. Get in here with your rod and give it to me.
Stuart: Okay, you need to say these things in your head before you say them out loud.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Justice League Recombination

Raj: I've said this before and I'll say it again: Aquaman sucks!

Quote from Howard in the episode The Colonization Application

Howard: How are the taxes going?
Bernadette: Okay, but you've got a lot of receipts for the Lego store in here.
Howard: Those are business expenses. You can write those off.
Bernadette: A $200 R2-D2 is a business expense?
Howard: Oh, Bernie, you're gonna have to sound a lot more confident when we get audited.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Itchy Brain Simulation

Leonard: If I take it off, Sheldon wins.
Penny: Sweetie, every night you don't kill him in his sleep, he wins.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Commitment Determination

Leonard: What am I supposed to do?
Penny: Err, keep your mouth off other women.

Quote from Bernadette in the episode The Mommy Observation

Leonard: You don't go into science for the money.
Bernadette: Speak for yourself. Last month my company both invented and cured restless eye syndrome. Ka-ching, ya blinky chumps!

Quote from Leonard in the episode The Earworm Reverberation

Sheldon: I remember the song! It's called "Darlin'" by the Beach Boys! Oh, thank goodness! I'm not crazy! I don't have to take a pigeon as my bride!
Leonard: There goes our shot at him living on the roof.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Clean Room Infiltration

Raj: Amy, good luck getting these guys excited about a dinner with a theme. I gave up when no one cared about my Tom Hanks-Giving.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Romance Resonance

Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not get lucky.
Amy: You and me both, brother.

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