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Quote from Penny in the episode The Engagement Reaction

Bernadette: So it's probably genetic.
Howard: Well, maybe. Mom also had just gotten some news that might have upset her.
Bernadette: What?
Howard: It's not important.
Bernadette: Come on, Howard, I'm going to be your wife. You can share anything with me.
Howard: You'd think that. But no.
Bernadette: You told her we were going to get married and she had a heart attack?
Howard: You can't take that personally.
Penny: How else is she supposed to take it?

Quote from Howard in the episode The Engagement Reaction

Howard: What you've got to keep in mind is that ever since my dad left, I've been the whole world to my mother. I mean, she'd be threatened by any woman who can give me what she can't.
Bernadette: You mean sexual intercourse?
Howard: Well, when you say it like that you make it sound creepy.

Quote from Bernadette in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Amy: I must say, Penny, this is great fun.
Penny: Glad you're enjoying yourself.
Amy: Until I met you and Bernadette, my trips to the bathroom had been entirely focused on elimination. Now they have a delightful social aspect.
Bernadette: Amy, you must've been in the bathroom with other women before.
Amy: Of course I have. But they were strangers and seemed off-put when I engaged in friendly stall-to-stall chit chat.
Bernadette: Some women don't like to get chummy when their panties are down.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Amy: You okay in there, bestie?
Penny: I'm fine.
Amy: The reason I ask is that many people experience bladder shyness, the inability to pass urine
Penny: Yeah, I said I'm fine. Stop talking to me.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Bernadette: Did I tell you Priya invited me and Howard to have dinner with her and Leonard?
Penny: Oh, that's nice.
Amy: No, it's not. It's a strategic maneuver. Leonard's new girlfriend is testing Bernadette's loyalty to you and the group. That bitch is crafty.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Bernadette: It doesn't matter. I'm going to tell her we can't make it.
Amy: Oh, no. You have to go.
Bernadette: I don't understand. I thought I was a teeny-tiny wildebeest.
Amy: You are, with hair that smells like strawberries. And we're going to use that to our advantage.
Penny: Wait. What are you talking about?
Amy: By accepting the invitation, Bernadette becomes a double agent inside the enemy camp. She could ferret out Priya's tactics, identify her weaknesses and feed her false information, such as, Leonard's no stranger to back-alley cockfights.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Amy: How do you feel about concealing a recording device in the cleavage of your ample bosom?
Bernadette: I don't want anything in my ample bosom.
Amy: Come on, Strawberries. Take one for the team.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Sheldon: Uh, do you know how I solved the balanced center combat-area problem? Five words, transitional quadrilateral to triangular tessellation.
Leonard: That's brilliant.
Sheldon: It's what I do. But wait, there's more. I also invented two new chess pieces. The serpent and the old woman.
Leonard: Okay, now I have to ask. What do they do?
Sheldon: When the serpent slithers to an opposing player's piece, that piece is considered poisoned and will die after two more moves. Ugh.
Leonard: All right.
Sheldon: Unless, it gets to the old woman in time, in which case she sucks out the poison, turning her into the Grand Empress, a piece combining the power of the knight, queen and serpent.
Leonard: Elegant.
Sheldon: That's because it's simple.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Leonard: Okay, well, I look forward to playing with you.
Sheldon: And...
Leonard: And what?
Sheldon: And a third person. It's three-person chess. I must say, ever since you started having regular intercourse, your mind has lost its keen edge. You should reflect on that.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Leonard: Hi. Hey, Raj, will you be joining us for dinner?
Raj: The lonely guy and the two happy couples? I'd rather get a prostate exam from a leper who walks away with nine fingers.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Priya: Oh, would you please stop feeling sorry for yourself?
Raj: I have to feel sorry for myself. I'm the only one who cares. Just like I'm the only one who'll have sex with me.
Leonard: Really? In front of your sister?
Priya: We shared a room growing up. This is not news to me.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Amy: I don't understand. Is this a way to break in new shoes?
Penny: No. Once these puppies touch the ground they're mine, and I'll have to wear them walking up and down Hollywood Boulevard in order to pay them off. Pretty, pretty, pretty.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Amy: Good news, the wildebeest is in the curry.
Penny: The what?
Amy: Bernadette is with Priya and Leonard. Message received. Commence Operation "Priya Wouldn't Wanna Be-ya."

Quote from Amy in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Penny: Hey. Seriously? Didn't you get enough of this cliquey crap in high school?
Amy: I wish. A clique requires friends. I didn't have any.
Penny: None?
Amy: I used to take my lunch down to the maintenance room and eat with the janitor. It was nice until his wife called me a puta and made me stop.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Amy: Hang on. It's the wildebeest. Priya just made a snide comment about your acting career.
Penny: What the hell did she say?
Amy: She thinks it's cool you're following your dream, no matter what.
Penny: That bitch!

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