Quotes from ‘The Work Song Nanocluster’
The Work Song Nanocluster After Penny has an idea for a home business, she soon regrets asking for Sheldon's help when takes over the operation. The whole gang ends up spending the night trying to ship an order of a thousand Penny blossoms. |
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: I'm sorry, coffee's out of the question. When I moved to California I promised my mother that I wouldn't start doing drugs.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: You are effectively paying yourself five dollars and nineteen cents a day.
Penny: A day?
Sheldon: There are children working in sneaker factories in Indonesia who out-earn you.
Quote from Howard
Sheldon: Camouflaging bald spots. That's primarily a male concern. Perhaps we could expand our market.
Penny: How are flower barrettes going to appeal to men?
Wolowitz: We add Bluetooth.
Quote from Penny
Penny: Since when do we offer one day rush?
Leonard: Amazon offers one day rush.
Penny: Yeah, but they don't have to glue the books together!
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: Penny, I'm a physicist. I have a working knowledge of the entire universe and everything it contains.
Penny: Who's Radiohead?
Sheldon: I have a working knowledge of the important things in the universe.
Quote from Raj
Wolowitz: Oh, stop it with the fake third world crap. Your father is a gynecologist and you had a house full of servants.
Raj: We only had four servants, and two of them were children.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: All right, are you familiar with the development that resulted from Honore Blanc's 1778 use of interchangeable parts? The assembly line, of course.
Penny: Okay, you know what, if I'm not allowed to be snide, you're not allowed to be condescending.
Sheldon: That wasn't a part of our original agreement, and I do not agree to it now.
Penny: All right, fine. How are we supposed to set up machines and conveyor belts in my apartment?
Sheldon: You're thinking of the moving assembly line, an understandable but not excusable mistake. No, the moving assembly line, that was introduced by Henry Ford in 1908. That innovation is what made possible our modern consumer culture by enabling a low-unit cost for manufactured goods. I guess that isn't one of the topics discussed on your Radiohead.
Quote from Penny
Sheldon: When I signed for this package, I was deputized by the United Parcel Service, and entrusted with its final delivery. I now need you to acknoweldge receipt of the package so I'm fully indemnified and no longer liable.
Penny: Sheldon, it's just a box of rhinestones.
Sheldon: Well, the content are irrelevant. A legal bailment has been created. Does that mean nothing to you?
Penny: It means nothing to anybody.
Quote from Leonard
Penny: Come on. What about the living organism of the workforce and the American spirit and Jiminy Crockett at the Alamo?
Leonard: Davy Crockett. Jiminy Crockett was a cricket.
Quote from Penny
Leonard: I can't believe we actually did it.
Howard: 1,000 friggin' Penny Blossoms.
Penny: I just want you guys to know I am really grateful for your help, and for every dollar I make, I'm going to give you 20 cents.
Howard: That's your entire profit margin.
Penny: Oh. Then never mind.
Quote from Leonard
Sheldon: Look at Planck's Constant. People say it's arbitrary. It could not be less arbitrary. If it varied even slightly, life as we know it would not exist. Bam! Now, let's reconsider the entire argument, but with entropy reversed and effect preceding cause, so you are thinking of a universe that's not expanding from the center. No, it is retreating from a, from a possibility space. Bam! This is a space where we are all essentially Alice through the Looking Glass, standing in front the Red Queen, and we're being offered a cracker to quench our thirst. Bam! Of course, in another universe, let's call it universe prime, there's another Sheldon. Let's call him Sheldon prime...
Penny: We should have let him go to bed.
Leonard: Bam.
Quote from Sheldon
Penny: Here, this will help.
Sheldon: Very well, but if this leads to opiates or hallucinogenics, you're going to have to answer to my mother.
Quote from Sheldon
Leonard: Sheldon, we still have 380 of these things to make.
Sheldon: I have complete faith that you will make them. Good night.
Penny: Leonard?
Leonard: Yeah, no. But, Sheldon, without your insight and leadership this entire enterprise will surely fail.
Sheldon: You're right, of course.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: I believe I'm hearing some negativity on the factory floor.
Penny: So?
Sheldon: Penny, the labor force is a living organism that must be carefully nurtured. Any counterproductive grumbling must be skilfully headed off by management. Observe. Hey! Less talk, more work!
Penny: Nicely done.
Sheldon: Thank you. You hear any union talk, you let me know.
Quote from Howard
Sheldon: Okay, that, right there, that equivocation and self-doubt, that is not the American spirit. Did Davy Crockett quit at the Alamo? Did Jim Bowie?
Howard: They didn't quit. They were massacred by, like, a gazillion angry Mexicans.
Quote from Penny
Sheldon: Alright, let me put it this way. Your gross receipts on this one order will be over $3,000 for one night's work.
Penny: You guys get started.
Leonard: What are you doing?
Penny: Going online to buy shoes!
Quote from Sheldon
Leonard: Are you thinking about adding a desiccant like calcium sulphate?
Howard: Actually, I'm thinking about this one stripper named Vega. But sure, calcium sulphate could work.
Sheldon: Let's think out of the box for a moment. How about a molecular sieve?
Leonard: Oh!
Penny: I've got a spaghetti strainer in the kitchen.
Sheldon: Wow.
Quote from Howard
Sheldon: Of course, but before we set up a marketing and distribution infrastructure, we should finish optimizing the manufacturing process. To start with, she has a terrible problem with moisture-induced glitter clump.
Penny: Yeah, it's a bitch.
Howard: Uh, I've seen this before.
Leonard: Where?
Howard: It's a common stripper problem. They dance, they sweat, they clump.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: Just to be clear here, you're asking for my assistance.
Penny: Yes.
Sheldon: And you understand that will involve me telling you what to do?
Penny: I understand.
Sheldon: And you're not allowed to be sarcastic or snide to me while I'm doing so.
Penny: Okay.
Sheldon: Good. Let's begin with the premise that everything you've done up to this point is wrong.
Penny: Oh, imagine that.
Sheldon: Sarcasm. Good-bye.
Penny: No, sorry. Wait, please come back.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: All right, ten dollars a day times five days a week, times 52 weeks a year is two thousand six hundred dollars.
Penny: That's all?
Sheldon: Before taxes.
Penny: Well, I don't have to pay taxes on this stuff.
Sheldon: I believe the Internal Revenue Service would strongly disagree.
Quote from Sheldon
Penny: Sheldon, don't you get it? If this takes off, I won't have to be a waitress anymore.
Sheldon: But then who will bring me my cheeseburger on Tuesday nights?
Penny: Another waitress.
Sheldon: What's her name?
Penny: I don't know.
Sheldon: And you're going to let her handle my food?
Penny: Nancy. Her name is Nancy.
Sheldon: I think you're just making that up.
Penny: Sheldon, I'm sorry about your hamburger, okay? I just don't want to be a waitress for the rest of my life.
Sheldon: Cheeseburger. I get a cheeseburger.
Penny: Fine, cheeseburger.
Sheldon: Maybe I'd be better off with Nancy.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: Bailment describes a relationship in common law where a physical possession of personal property, or chattels, is transferred from one person, the bailor, to another person, the bailee.
Penny: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Look, look, look. I started a business.
Sheldon: Obviously, not a cleaning business.
Quote from Sheldon
Howard: Too bad. You know the rules of Secret Agent Laser Obstacle Chess. Leonard died again, Sheldon. You're up.
Sheldon: Despite my deep love of chess, lasers and aerosol disinfectant, I must forfeit.
Leonard: Why?
Sheldon: Because it's almost eleven o'clock.
Leonard: So?
Sheldon: So ... Penny has a don't knock on my door before eleven o'clock or I punch you in the throat rule.
Quote from Howard
Penny: Well, it's a little juvenile. I mean, it kind of looks like the MySpace page of a 13-year-old girl.
Leonard: No, it doesn't.
Howard: Please, Dateline could use it to attract predators.
Quote from Howard
Howard: Hey, you know what'd be a great idea? We get some girls over here and play Laser Obstacle Strip Chess.
Leonard: Believe me, Howard, any girl who would be willing to play that, you don't want to see naked.
Howard: You underestimate me.