Quotes from ‘The Vegas Renormalization’

The Vegas Renormalization

'The Vegas Renormalization' - Season 2, Episode 21

When Howard is dumped by Leslie Winkle, Leonard and Koothrappali take Wolowitz to Las Vegas. Back in Pasadena, Sheldon is forced to spend the night with Penny.

Air Date: April 27, 2009.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: What were you doing at Penny's?
Sheldon: Well, we had dinner, played some games, and then I spent the night. Oh, and you'll be happy to know that I now have a much better understanding of 'friends with benefits.'

Quote from Howard

Raj: What do you say, Howard?
Howard: I say Vegas baby!
Raj: What are you gonna tell your mother?
Howard: Sea World baby!

Hooker: What's your name?
Raj: Rajesh Ramayan Koothrappali.
Hooker: Hello Rajesh Ram...Hello Rajesh.

Quote from Raj

Raj: It's too bad he wasn't here for that hooker. She's exactly his type. A hooker. Y

Quote from Howard

Wolowitz: Raj, there's no place for truth on the Internet.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Penny.
Penny: Yeah.
Sheldon: Thanks for letting me stay here.
Penny: Oh, you're welcome sweetie.
Sheldon: Okay, I'm sleepy now get out.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: What exactly does that expression mean, 'friends with benefits?' Does he provide her with health insurance?

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: There was a tall man from Cornwall
Whose length exceeded his bed.
"My body fits on it.
But barely upon it.
There's no room for my big Cornish head!"

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: You know, I'm given to understand that there's an entire city in Nevada devoted specifically to help people like Howard forget their problems. They replace them with new problems such as alcoholism, gambling addiction and sexually transmitted diseases.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: Hey, Sheldon, are you coming?
Sheldon: I'd rather have a blowfly lay eggs and hatch larvae in my auditory canal.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: Mmm, what smells so good?
Sheldon: That is the intoxicating aroma of Kadhai Paneer. A perfect culinary representation of the freedom this evening holds. Not only is it Indian cuisine, which Koothrappali loathes, it contains a generous helping of peanuts, which would reduce Wolowitz to a wheezing 97-pound blister. And finally, its main ingredient is paneer, a farmer's cheese that would cause Leonard to render any room uninhabitable within minutes.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: That's preposterous. I do not resemble C-3PO. Don't get me wrong, I'm flattered. I just don't see it.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: We have a bowl. Our keys are in the bowl. You should get a bowl.
Penny: I just don't understand; how can beautiful mind of Sheldon Cooper forget his keys in the first place?
Sheldon: I left them in the bowl.

Quote from Raj

Raj: I'm telling you, Leonard, video slot machines, free drinks brought to us by a bosomy barmaid and all you can eat shrimp for $3.95. Disneyland can suck it. This is the real happiest place on Earth.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: You know I'm in such a good mood I'm actually finding your tenuous grasp of the English language folksy and charming today.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Penny.
Penny: What?
Sheldon: I can't sleep.
Penny: Maybe that's because your hole is still open.

Quote from Raj

Raj: (Reading Howard's tweet) I am so lonely and horny, I may open this $20 jar of peanuts and end it all.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: You're the milk thief! Leonard said I was crazy but I knew that carton felt lighter.

Quote from Howard

Howard: (Answering phone) You've reached "Friends with Benefits", for a booty call, press 1 now.

Quote from Leonard

Howard: Okay, are you from Star Wars universe?
Leonard: Yes.
Howard: Were you in the original trilogy?
Leonard: Yes.
Howard: Is there a picture of you in my wallet wearing a metal bikini?
Leonard: God, I hope not. And no, I'm not Princess Leia.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: Look, imagine you maintained a friendship with someone you had sex with, but you were free to date whoever you wanted.
Sheldon: I'm sorry, I can't imagine any of that.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: Alright, back to the game.
Sheldon: I believe it's my turn, you may begin your questions whenever you're ready.
Raj: Are you Spock?
Sheldon: I don't like this game.

Quote from Howard

Raj: What happened with Leslie, why did she dump you?
Howard: I don't know. She just said Howard, momma's a rolling stone. And then her call waiting beeped and she was gone.
Sheldon: I don't understand. If you were in a non-emotional relationship then why are you having what appears be an emotional response?
Leonard: Sheldon, he obviously had feelings for her.
Howard: Of course I had feelings for her, I saw her naked for God's sake!

Quote from Howard

Leonard: Howard, could I borrow some after shave?
Howard: Black case, top compartment.
Leonard: That is a lot of cologne.
Howard: First row are your musks, second is wood, leathers and botanicals, third is assorted pheromones, tread lightly.

Quote from Leonard

Raj: Oh, we should have a plan in case one of us gets lucky.
Leonard: Okay, uh, if I get lucky I'll take her to my stately manor outside Gotham City, and if you get lucky, I'll sleep on the moon.
Raj: Sounds like a plan.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: Hang on, I think the emergency key is around here somewhere.
Sheldon: We have a bowl. Our keys go in a bowl. You should get a bowl.
Penny: So, how did the beautiful mind of Sheldon Cooper forget his key in the first place.
Sheldon: I left them in the bowl.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: Alright, Sheldon, let's just calm down and we'll call the building manager, he'll come open your door, you just eat your dinner here while you're waiting.
Sheldon: Eat? My dinner? In your apartment?
Penny: Yeah, why not?
Sheldon: Sure, why not? And after the sun's down we can all pile in my pick-up and go skinny-dipping down at the creek. 'cause today's the day to stop making sense.

Quote from Raj

Raj: What's wrong with you dude, that woman was all up in my jammy.
Leonard: Okay, I hate to break this to you and whatever your jammy is, but, I'm pretty sure she is a prostitute.
Raj: What? No.
Leonard: Okay, let me put it this way, in your entire life, how many gorgeous women have walked straight up to you in a bar and asked if you wanted to party.
Raj: Maybe I can save her.
Leonard: Maybe, but I'm guessing it will cost you about $500 an hour to try.
Raj: It was lovely meeting you, best of luck in your future endeavors.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: So, how was your day?
Penny: Are you trying to make small talk? Oh, sweetie, you really don't have to.
Sheldon: No, it's the accepted convention. How was your day?
Penny: Well, uh, they shifted my schedule around at the restaurant so my hours are going to be a little different...
Sheldon: I'm sorry, that's not going to interest me at all, just eat.

Quote from Raj

Mikayla: You want the girlfriend experience.
Leonard: Yes, yeah, exactly, the girlfriend experience.
Raj: Uh, actually, if it's not too much to ask, could we have the Jewish girlfriend experience.

Quote from Penny

Sheldon: Okay, that's question 20, you have to guess.
Penny: Oh, God, I don't know Sheldon, are you Star Wars?
Sheldon: How can one person be a whole movie?

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I was Spock. Are you and Leonard friends with benefits?
Penny: What?
Sheldon: Are you and Leonard friends with benefits?
Penny: Where did that even come from, did he say we were?
Sheldon: No, Leonard said nothing, but who knows what goes on over here when he pretends your mail was mis-delivered.
Penny: No, just mail, no benefits.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Sing Soft Kitty.
Penny: That's only for when you're sick.
Sheldon: Homesick is a type of being sick.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: Oh, alright. I will give you my bed on one condition. That you promise to zip your hole for the next eight hours.
Sheldon: May I say one last thing.
Penny: Only if it doesn't rhyme.
Sheldon: Alright. Goodnight.