Quotes from ‘The Toast Derivation’
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The Toast Derivation When the gang start spending more time at Priya's apartment, Sheldon realizes Leonard is the center of their social group, not him. Meanwhile, Penny tries to move on after seeing Leonard in a new relationship. |
Quote from Zack Johnson
Sheldon: Jacuzzi is a commercial brand, hot tub is the generic term, i.e., all Jacuzzis are hot tubs, but not all hot tubs are Jacuzzis.
Zack: Is that like all thumbs are fingers but not all fingers are thumbs?
Sheldon: Surprisingly, yes.
Zack: Nice! Now what exactly are toes?
Quote from Leonard
Wolowitz: Raj, did you ever tell your sister about the time Sheldon got punched by Bill Gates?
Priya: Oh, God, you're kidding.
Raj: No, Gates gave a speech at the university. Sheldon went up to him afterwards and said, "Maybe if you weren't so distracted by sick children in Africa you could have put a little more thought into Windows Vista."
Leonard: Bam, right in the nose. Made me proud to own a PC.
Quote from Leonard
Sheldon:He'll be back.
Leonard: (Through the door) Of course, I'll be back, I live here!
Quote from Amy
Amy: Y'know, if being on your own is new to you, I'd be happy to share some tension-relieving techniques for ladies I've perfected over the years. For example, do you own an electric toothbrush?
Penny: No
Amy: You should get one!
Quote from Amy
Bernadette: We just thought you might want to go out and have a good time. Maybe go dancing?
Penny: Oh, gee, thanks, but I'm not really in the mood.
Amy: You do understand that it will distract you from obsessing over the rich variety of sweet loving that your ex-boyfriend is currently receiving from the fiery jewel of Mumbai?
Quote from Sheldon
Stuart: Can you please get back to the drunk girl, I'd like something to think about in the shower.
Zack: Oh, yeah, right. Anyway, she takes off all her clothes, climbs in the hot tub, and the first thing I noticed--
Sheldon: The water level rose.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: Oh look, it's Harry Potter and 98% of Sorcerer's stone.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: (Waving Zork game) Pick me, pick me, I'm fun.
Kripke: That all sucks the big hairy meatball.
Quote from Sheldon
Zack: Anyway, after we get done snowboarding, I go to the lodge and get in the Jacuzzi. There's no one around, so naturally I'm free-balling it. Next thing I know, this beautiful chick shows up. Drunk out of her skull, wants to get in with me.
Sheldon: Question: was it a Jacuzzi or a hot tub?
Kripke: Really, that's your question?
Zack:What's the difference?
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: We could also stop using the letter M. But I think that idea is isguided and oronic.
Quote from Sheldon
Leonard: Hey, I thought you were with your new buddies.
Sheldon: I had to leave. They were having fun wrong.
Quote from Barry Kripke
Sheldon: Forgive me, but I think you'll find my story is more interesting.
Barry Kripke: Does your story have wet breasts in it?
Quote from Sheldon
Priya: Would you like some homemade chili?
Sheldon: Are there beans in it?
Priya: Yes.
Sheldon: Then it's not chili. Real chili has no beans in it. But you're from a foreign land, so your ignorance is forgiven.
Levar Burton: *Walks through the apartment door and stares in horror at the Kripke, Zach and Stuart singing*
Hello I c... Oh no, uh huh. *Slams door shut* I am so done with Twitter.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: Sadly Penny, this evening I am the dark knight roaming these mean streets alone. A windbreaker for my cape and a stern expression for my cowl.
Quote from Howard
Sheldon: (knocking) All my friends. (knocking) All my friends. (knocking) All my friends.
Howard: Wow, I think it's like Beetlejuice. We must've said his name too many times.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: When he finished, he shouted "Eureka"!
Zack: No, I always shouted, "Holy, moly!" Don't know why, just do.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: At one point Raj put on reggae music and his sister took off her shoes. It was like the last days of Caligula.
Quote from Zack Johnson
Zack: Okay, I'm ready. I'm Zack, and I'm, uh ... oh, crap, why is this so hard?
Quote from Amy
Amy: If you'd have let me bring the chloroform, we wouldn't have had to put up with all this jibber-jabber!
Quote from Howard
Priya: I guess he is a little quirky.
Wolowitz: Quirky? That crazy bastard is looking at quirky in the rear view mirror.
Quote from Zack Johnson
Zack: So, long story short, I nailed her.
Sheldon: When he finished, he shouted Eureka!
Zack: No, I always shout, Holy Moly! Don't know why. Just do.
Quote from Sheldon
Kripke: I'm Barry Kripke and I'm here because you told me there was a raffle. Where is the raffle?
Sheldon: Patience, patience, Barry, the waffle-- ahem. The raffle... is the grand finale to an evening-long festival of fun and folly.
Kripke: One more question--
Sheldon: Yes, you must be present to win.
Quote from Barry Kripke
Barry Kripke: I'm Barry Kripke and I'm here because you told me there was going to be a raffle. When is the raffle?
Quote from Amy
Amy (to Penny): You do understand that it will distract you from obsessing over the rich variety of sweet loving your ex-boyfriend is currently receiving from the fiery jewel of Mumbai?
Quote from Barry Kripke
Barry Kripke: Go ahead, Zach. Naked drunk girl, free balling. Continue.
Quote from Bernadette
Amy: Outstanding. And if we fail, we can always stop at CVS and pick you out a nice toothbrush. I call mine Gerard.
Bernadette: That's a bit sad.
Quote from Zack Johnson
Zack: I'm Zack and I'm, uh ... could you come back to me?