Leonard: What am I supposed to do?
Penny: Err, keep your mouth off other women.

Penny: Wait, what is wrong with you two? He was talking about television during their date night.
Sheldon: Oh, not just date night. Our 5th anniversary.
Penny: Okay, see, that's even dumber than you wondering if being bitten by a goat would give you the powers of a goat.
Sheldon: If that happens, don't make me wait ten years to watch you eat a tin can.

Sheldon: Amy's mad at me, and I'm not clear why.
Penny: Okay, were you talking before she got upset?
Sheldon: Yes.
Penny: That's probably it.

Sheldon: But I have been getting better with sarcasm, if you want to give that a try.
Amy: *sarcastic* Oh, sure, I'd love to.
Sheldon: Whenever you're ready.

Amy: This isn't easy to say, because I love you, but... I need some time to take a step back and reevaluate our situation.
Sheldon: Oh.
Amy: I hope you understand.
Sheldon: Okay.
Amy: Bye, Sheldon.
Sheldon: Well, Gollum, you're an expert on rings. [Sheldon takes out an engagement ring from his desk drawer] What do I do with this one?

Penny: Hey, I don't think she's wrong about you going too slow in the relationship.
Sheldon: Too slow?
Penny: Yeah, you've been going out for years. You haven't even slept together.
Sheldon: That's right. It's called foreplay.

Bernadette: I think if Raj wants to break up with a girl, he can do it.
Howard: How are you saying that with a straight face?
Bernadette: *laughs* I don't know.

Amy: Sheldon, do you understand the irony of your fixation on a man with super speed, while after five years all I can get out of you is a distracted make-out session on a couch?
Sheldon: Irony's not really my strong suit.

Sheldon: What happened?
Penny: Your buddy got mugged by some baby farm animals.
Sheldon: Been there.

Penny: What'd you say to her?
Sheldon: Well, I just asked her if I should start watching the new Flash TV series.
Penny: And that made her angry?
Sheldon: Baffling, right? We were necking like a couple of hooligans under the school bleachers. I stopped so I could ask the question. Next thing I know, good-bye, kissy face. Hello, yelly face.

Penny: Thanks for cooking.
Leonard: My pleasure.
Penny: That carrot was delicious.
Leonard: Yeah. I wish I'd fought harder for the rest of 'em.

Bernadette: Maybe it's time we tell him he needs to move out.
Howard: We should have done it months ago.
Bernadette: I know, but his store was reopening, and then there were the holidays, and then he was sick.
Howard: Yeah, right, sick. He didn't have jaundice. He just looks like that.

Penny: Why is everyone so concerned with us setting a date? We're committed to each other. We're happy. A ceremony isn't gonna change anything.
Sheldon: So you're never getting married? It's his whining, isn't it?
Leonard: Sheldon, I'm not a whiner.
Sheldon: It's amusing that he doesn't hear it.

Sheldon: My aunt and uncle were married 63 years. Towards the end, it was like watching cheese melt.

Sheldon: After all these years. I'm really happy for the two of you.
Penny: Oh, thank you.
Leonard: Thanks.
Sheldon: Now get out of my spot.