Leonard: Are you jealous?
Penny: I know, I know, I shouldn't be. He's super sweet. I should be happy for them.
Leonard: Oh, it's driving me crazy, too.
Penny: Really?
Leonard: Yes. I was trying to pretend like it wasn't so you wouldn't think I was petty.
Penny: Wha-- turns out we're both petty.
Leonard: I love you so much.
Penny: Aw.

Sheldon: Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken.
Penny: Yeah, well your Ken can kiss my Barbie.

Leonard: If I take it off, Sheldon wins.
Penny: Sweetie, every night you don't kill him in his sleep, he wins.

Leonard: What am I supposed to do?
Penny: Err, keep your mouth off other women.

Bernadette: This is so great. Why don't we do it more often?
Amy: Because you have two kids, I have Sheldon, and Penny's apparently in the gym all the time, 'cause damn, look at her!
Bernadette: Yeah, so impressive how you manage to bounce back after having no babies.
Penny: Ah, another reason why we don't do this more often.

Penny: Thank you, but you shouldn't have spent so much.
Zack: Nah. It's cool. I sold my company for a boatload of money. And then I bought a boat. Then I got married. Guess where.
Amy: On your boat?
Zack: No, but that would've been awesome!

Penny: Did-did you send this over?
Zack: I did. I asked for the most expensive one they have. They said it was $200, and I said I want a more expensive one. And then, they said it was $300.
Amy: But it-it was the same-
Penny: Don't.