Howard: Wil! Wil Wheaton!
Raj: Open! Open!
Wil Wheaton: No. No. No. [to Sheldon] Hell no.

Wil Wheaton: Game over, Moonpie.

Wil Wheaton: Did that guy just say "Revenge is a dish best served cold" to me in Klingon?

Wil Wheaton: Hey look, they named their team after me!

Wil Wheaton: All right, Professor Proton fans, get ready to meet Dr. Sheldon Cooper and Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler, a pair of real-life scientists who may win the Nobel Prize. That's like the Kids' Choice Award, but with more science and less slime.

Sheldon: Kids' Choice Award? Why would they let kids choose anything? They're basically human larvae.
Wil Wheaton: Well, they are kind of our target audience.
Sheldon: Greetings, children. Toys, am I right?
Amy: He is. He has hundreds of them.

Wil Wheaton: So you two have discovered something that a lot of people are really excited about.
Amy: We have.
Wil Wheaton: Now, before you explain it, keep in mind that our average viewer is this many.