Bernadette: Every other week I serve at a soup kitchen downtown.
Penny: Ooh, I can't do that. If I stand over a steaming pot, my hair just goes boing! What else could I do?
Amy: There's Habitat for Humanity, building houses for the poor.
Penny: Okay, come on, I don't even have my own house, I'm going to build one for someone else?

Sheldon: Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken.
Penny: Yeah, well your Ken can kiss my Barbie.

Leonard: What am I supposed to do?
Penny: Err, keep your mouth off other women.

Leonard: If I take it off, Sheldon wins.
Penny: Sweetie, every night you don't kill him in his sleep, he wins.

Leonard: Do you think we can outrun him?
Sheldon: I don't need to outrun him, I just need to outrun you.

Penny: Did Sheldon change the Wi-Fi password again?
Leonard: Yeah, it's "Penny already eats our food she can pay for Wi-Fi". No spaces.

Sheldon: I'm not going to say I told you so, but we could have killed him.