Raj: You can't wear the hands on the date.
Sheldon: Hulk sad!

Penny: You know, I believe in ghosts, too.
Leonard: Great.
Penny: And astrology.
Leonard: I know, and pyramid power and healing crystals.
Penny: Oh, no, no, no, crystals don’t work.
Leonard: Really, that’s the line? Psychics are real, but crystals are voodoo?
Penny: Oh, Voodoo is real. You don't want to mess with Voodoo.

Leonard: How can I go out with a woman who believes in psychics?
Howard: Hey, I once dated a girl who believed she was abducted by aliens.
Leonard: And that didn't bother you?
Howard: Au contraire. It meant that she was gullible and open to a little probing.

Raj: He'll have a Shirley Temple.
Sheldon: And don't be chintzy with the Shirley.

Howard: I don't like to kiss and tell, but somebody made it to eighth base.
Leonard: What the hell is eighth base?
Howard: Seventh base with shirt off. Well, my shirt.

Leonard: What's going on?
Sheldon: We scored. I'm the wingman.

Sheldon: Goodnight puny human!

Sheldon: I've just discovered I don't have enough room on my hard drive for a Linux partition, so you and I are going to perform a full backup, re-initialize and then re-install all my operating systems.

Abby: Hey that's pretty cool, what is it?
Sheldon: It's a limited edition Green Lantern lantern. My friend is looking for someone to copulate with.
Abby: You're very funny. I'm Abby.

Sheldon: Have you chosen one to copulate with?

Raj: Dude, there's so many cool things we could be doing tonight. Look. At the Glendale Galleria, "Put on your best zoot suit, it's a salute to Swing music in the center court near Macy's. 5pm to 9pm", huh, huh? A salute to zoot. Sounds like a hoot.
Sheldon: I'm sorry, Raj, I have no desire to salute any article of clothing tonight. Much less one that's linked to race riots in the 1940s.
Raj: Race riots?
Sheldon: The zoot suit riots.
Raj: Oh. I always thought that was some sort of after-Christmas sale.

Raj: Sheldon, I'm begging you. I want to go to this mixer, and I don't want to go alone.
Sheldon: Well, you're in luck. There's a mixer here in Flatland. Oh, look, there's a sexually attractive line segment, you should chat her up.
Raj: What?
Sheldon: Tell her you're a circle. Flatland gals are all hot for circles.

Raj: They get girlfriends and they just abandon us?
Sheldon: It is great, isn't it? We have a wonderful evening ahead of us.

Raj: Come on, Sheldon, the world is filled with people doing things outside. Let's go outside. Outside is good.
Sheldon: If outside is so good, why has mankind spent thousands of years trying to perfect inside?

Sheldon: I would like a root beer float.
Raj: Sheldon, they don't have ice cream.
Sheldon: They don't? Well, apparently these people and I differ greatly on the definition of party.