Sheldon: Gotta run. (Looks down at scissors) But not with scissors, that would be unsafe.

Sheldon: Bongo solo!

Leonard: It's 3 in the morning!
Sheldon: 3 in the morning is a good time for bongos.
Leonard: I was sleeping!
Sheldon: Leonard sleep while I play bongos.
Leonard: No, I don't.
Sheldon: Leonard no sleep while I play bongos.

Penny: Where are you going?
Sheldon: Wherever the music takes me, kitten.

Sheldon: I play bongos while walking down the stairs.
*Sheldon falls*
Sheldon: Never play bongos while walking down the stairs

Amy: There's not a hair on my body I wouldn't let this woman trim.

Leonard: Please don't let this be Sheldon playing bongos.

Wolowitz: I'm so dehydrated. My pee's like toothpaste.

Penny: Okay, what just happened?
Leonard: I don't know. Between you playing chess like Bobby Fischer and Sheldon being okay with you in his spot, I'm guessing someone went back in time, stepped on a bug, and changed the course of human events.

Howard: Sometime through the night an armadillo fell in, then he spooned me.

Sheldon: Hello Leonard, do you like my bongos?

Leonard: Sheldon, it's okay. He can do it. He's a barber.
Sheldon: He's not a barber, he's the nephew. He's an example of the kind of nepotism that runs rampant in the barbering industry. Besides, Mr. D'Onofrio knows exactly how I like my hair done because he has all my haircut records from my barber in Texas.

Sheldon: Bet you didn't know that I play bongos.

Sheldon: Oh, dear. Mr D'Onofrio's in the hospital. Why do these things always happen to me?

Sheldon: When I first moved here, I was nervous about finding a new barber, so my mother had all my haircut records sent here to Mr. D'Onofrio.
Leonard: There's no such thing as haircut records.