Amy: I'm leading a study to see if deficiency of the monoamine oxidase enzyme leads to paralysing fear in monkies.
Bernadette: If they're anything like humans, the answer is yes.
Amy: You've done this experiment on humans?
Bernadette: You mean like death row inmates with nothing to lose? No, that would be unethical.

Amy: It's actually steamier than it looks. Sheldon's looking up the phallic symbolism of root vegetables in renaissance paintings.
Sheldon: Oh no, I got bored of that. I'm just browsing cuticle scissors on Amazon.

Raj: What started as a pap smear turned into a date, which turned into her working there, which turned into marriage, which then turned into hatred which continues to this day.

Sheldon: I appreciate your concern but I won't be seeing any more of Amy than I already do. I assume we'll deduct any extra time I see her at work from our weekly quota.'
Leonard: Please let me be there when you tell her that.
Sheldon: Why? So you can see the look on her face when she hears my top notch idea?
Leonard: Please, oh please, just let me be there.

Penny: Awkward silence, Sheldon on his phone, no touching; somebody's having date night.

Penny: You know, not a lot of people know this. But the monoamine oxidase enzyme was discovered by a woman, Mary Bernheim.
*Amy and Bernadette look puzzled by Penny's knowledge*
Penny: That's right, my phone is just as smart as you guys!

Sheldon: Did you know that Los Angeles has a little Sri Lanka?
Leonard: I did not.
Sheldon: Well, I do now. They're a lovely people, although terrifying when you wake up face to face with them.

Penny: How do you not tear off his clothes and take him right here on this table?
Sheldon: If you do that I'll scream.

Penny: Okay, what happened between you and Amy?
Sheldon: Can you believe she said I embarrassed her?
Penny: Yeah.

Sheldon: Look at her, desperately wishing she was over her at the cool table.
[Cut to Amy laughing with her colleagues at another table]
Sheldon: Don't worry little moth, the flame will come to you.

Sheldon: You want some mutton and coconut milk?
Amy: No.
Sheldon: Boy I can not give this stuff away.

Amy: And this is Dr. Gundersen from Stockholm.
Sheldon: Ah, Sweden. Home of my favorite Muppet and second-favorite meatball.
*Dr. Gundersen and Amy look blankly at Sheldon*
Sheldon: Okay, the Nordic reputation for a lack of humor is well founded. Boy, is his name Gundersen or No-fun-dersen?

Sheldon: You know, riding with Leonard has got a little tedious lately. The only car game he ever wants to play is the quiet game. And he's terrible at it, I always win.

Sheldon: If it makes you feel any better, Amy and I are fine. I mean really good.

Amy: Where are we going with this Dr. Cooper?
Sheldon: Oh please, I'm your boyfriend. Call me Sheldon.