Raj: Well, I haven't met her yet, but her name is Anu. My father says she comes from a good family. She's in her 30s. She works in hospitality management. So, as long as I can get through six to ten dates without revealing my true self this is happening.

Raj: Oh man, first monster I see I'm gonna sneak up behind him, whip out my wand and shoot my magic all over his ass!
Stuart: Do you hear yourself when you say these things?

Raj: Doesn't anyone have a rod of resurrection? Because if you've got one, I need it bad. Get in here with your rod and give it to me.
Stuart: Okay, you need to say these things in your head before you say them out loud.

Raj: Okay, here we go. [to Leonard & Penny] Say cheese. [to Sheldon & Amy] Say cheese. [to Howard & Bernadette] Say cousin.

Stuart: Do you still want to go out with me?
Denise: Absolutely. Hey, maybe we can go find Nemo together.
Stuart: That's a good one.
Denise: Do your 63 other crayon friends know you're out?
Stuart: Are you just gonna make fun of me all night?
Denise: Probably.
Stuart: Great. So what are we thinking, Chinese?
Denise: Yeah, I'm in the mood for orange chicken.

Amy: Well, Leonard and Penny are our best friends. They know us better than anyone. They said it's the perfect gift. We must be missing something. You don't think it's a marital aid, do you?
Sheldon: Don't be silly. Amy, how is this big glass shaft going to aid our marriage?

Amy: Let's just go to sleep. We'll look at it in the morning with fresh eyes, and maybe it'll come to us.
Sheldon: Fine.
Amy: Or we go tear apart that box and look for a clue.
Sheldon: Staying up past my bedtime and solving mysteries? Who knew married life could be this good?