Penny: Ooh, these are cute. Of course if I buy them, I'll have to rent my womb out to a gay couple.

Penny: At one point, they had me figure out how to get a banana out of a puzzle box.
Leonard: Wait, Sheldon gave me a banana in a box. He was testing me, too.
Penny: Unbelievable.
Leonard: And how could a chimp even solve that? That was impossible.
Penny: Really? You couldn't get it out?

Leonard: If I take it off, Sheldon wins.
Penny: Sweetie, every night you don't kill him in his sleep, he wins.

Sheldon: Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken.
Penny: Yeah, well your Ken can kiss my Barbie.

Raj: She didn't even get to see my penis.

Penny: I'm sorry, shoes, but you have to go back.
Shoebox (Penny): But, Penny, we love you.
Penny: I love you, too, but you cost more than my rent.
Shoebox (Penny): But Penny, you look so good in us.
Penny: (To Amy) Damn it, the shoes are right!

Sheldon: Red is angry, yellow is frightened, green is jealous and blue is depressed. Perhaps we can assign a color to lonely.
Raj: Nothing rhymes with orange. Its probably lonely.
Sheldon: All right. Come in. You look positively orange with loneliness. No, I dont see that catching on at all.