Howard: Son of a bitch! He bit me!
Bernadette: Are you okay?
Howard: No, I'm not okay! Wild rabbits can have rabies!
Bernadette: Oh. Well, why did you put your finger near its mouth?
Howard: Poor judgment, obviously.
Bernadette: He's so little. I'm sure it's fine.
Howard: How can it be fine? I just got attacked by a clearly anti-Semitic wild animal.

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Bernadette: Maybe we should get one of those machines to help her up the stairs.
Howard: You mean a forklift?

Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not cry.
Howard: That's true, you'd rust.

Sheldon: Oh, and speaking of Valentine's Day, I haven't forgotten about you tonight.
Amy: What do you mean?
Sheldon: Well, you've become such an integral part of my life as well as this show, I felt it only right to include your name in the title.
Amy: Oh, that is so sweet.
Sheldon: So from now on, this program will be officially known as Dr. Sheldon Cooper and Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler present Dr. Sheldon Cooper's Fun With Flags.
Amy: Catchy.

Amy: Since we're live, you'll finally be able to reach out to us with your flag thoughts and flag questions.
Sheldon: Allow us to answer a few quick ones that we get all the time. Uh, yes, I really am a doctor. Uh, yes, she really is my girlfriend.
Amy: No, I just blink a lot, it's not Morse code for "rescue me."

Raj: But, Amy, when you and Sheldon split up, didn't you start dating someone right away? Amy: Well, I ... I wouldn't say right away.
Sheldon: And actually, it was three different men.
Barry Kripke: Three different men?! Damn, girl, way to give the milk away!