Amy: We've got someone who couldn't be here but really wanted to wish you a happy birthday.
Stephen Hawking: Hello, Sheldon.
Sheldon: (gasps) Professor Hawking.
Stephen Hawking: Happy birthday to you.
Sheldon: Thank you so much. I can't believe you're-
Stephen Hawking: Happy birthday to you.
Sheldon: Oh, you're singing. Well, I'm sorry.
Stephen Hawking: Happy birthday, dear Sheldon.
Leonard: Uh, Professor Hawking, if you just give us one second, we'll light the candles, and we can all sing together.
Stephen Hawking: I was crushing it, but all right.

Hooker: What's your name?
Raj: Rajesh Ramayan Koothrappali.
Hooker: Hello Rajesh Ram...Hello Rajesh.

Bernadette: Besides, Penny and I are having a girl's night tonight.
Amy: Girls night, what does that entail?
Bernadette: Oh you know, girls get together hang out share girl talk.
Amy: I'm a girl.
Bernadette: Oh well maybe you could join us. I'll ask Penny.
Amy: No need, Penny and I are very close.
Leonard: You are?
Amy: Yes, In fact our mensies are synchronized.

Penny: You locked them in your basement?
Dr. Lorvis: Well, they're not locked in. The door just sticks.
Penny: Okay, so how do they unstick it?
Dr. Lorvis: They'd need the key.

Penny: So what's going on?
Sheldon: I don't know. I looked around the room, and I saw all the faces and the presents, and it it was just too much.
Penny: I get that. Hey, you want to just bring a few people in here? You know, Wil Wheaton in the bathtub, Batman on the toilet. It'll be like the weirdest Comic-Con ever.

Leslie Winkle: Uh, in the past, I would've said something obnoxious, like, "Happy birthday, dumbass". But I'm not gonna do it. You and I have both grown a lot, and it's just so nice to see you all again. So happy birthday, Sheldon.
Sheldon: Oh. Oh, now, you know I hate change. Say it.
Leslie Winkle: Happy birthday, dumbass!

Sheldon: I don't think I can go back out there.
Penny: That's fine. You know, I hate that your sister and her friends used to torture you. But what I hate even more is, if I was there, I would have tortured you, too.
Sheldon: Based on this pep talk, I'd say you're still doing it.
Penny: My point is, there was a time I never would've been friends with someone like you, and now you are one of my favorite people. So, if what you need is to spend your birthday in a bathroom, I'm happy to do it with you.
Sheldon: Well, everyone will think I'm weird.
Penny: Sweetie, you are weird. Everyone knows you're weird, but they're all still here because they care about you so much.