Bernadette: I'm a little tired, Howie. You ready to go?
Howard: Yeah, one sec. I just need to sign this contract.
Bernadette: What is it?
Howard: Well, we ran into a problem about my share of the patent, so we're forming a partnership to split anything we make equally.
Penny: Sheldon, did you draft the contract?
Sheldon: You bet I did.
Penny: Ooh. (To Amy) You're gonna make out so hard tonight!

Sheldon: Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken.
Penny: Yeah, well your Ken can kiss my Barbie.

Leonard: What am I supposed to do?
Penny: Err, keep your mouth off other women.

Leonard: If I take it off, Sheldon wins.
Penny: Sweetie, every night you don't kill him in his sleep, he wins.

Leonard: Hang on. Maybe there should be a "no insult" clause about me, too.
Sheldon: Do you still like cilantro?
Leonard: Yeah.
Sheldon: You're tying my hands here.

Howard: See, he's not wearing a tie.
Leonard: Well, he's a patent attorney. Maybe his tie is pending.

Leonard: Hold on, hold on. So the three of us do all the work and only end up with 25%? Patent Attorney: Dr. Hofstadter, this university has been paying your salaries for over ten years. Did you think we do that out of the goodness of our hearts?
Leonard: Well, until you just said that mean thing, kinda.