Raj: Hey, Claire.
Claire: Hey, what's up?
Raj: Hi, yeah. Um, I was wondering, if you're free Saturday night, all my friends are going to a wine tasting.
Claire: Sure, I guess. If you don't think meeting your friends is too big a step.
Raj: Why would it be too big a step?
Claire: I don't know. I just don't want things to get weird.
Raj: Nothing to worry about. People meet people all the time, and it isn't weird. I met Bon Jovi once, which you'd think might be weird. Turns out, total sweetheart.
Claire: Okay, but you and I have been keeping things casual. Uh, will you introduce me as your friend or as your girlfriend? What if I like them and they don't like me? What if they like me and I don't like them?
Raj: Boy, it wasn't this hard with Bon Jovi. I said you rock, he said "Thanks, man," and that was that.

Raj: Amy, good luck getting these guys excited about a dinner with a theme. I gave up when no one cared about my Tom Hanks-Giving.

Raj: Oh man, first monster I see I'm gonna sneak up behind him, whip out my wand and shoot my magic all over his ass!
Stuart: Do you hear yourself when you say these things?

Raj: Doesn't anyone have a rod of resurrection? Because if you've got one, I need it bad. Get in here with your rod and give it to me.
Stuart: Okay, you need to say these things in your head before you say them out loud.

Leonard: Hey, did you ever think about the military applications for the guidance system?
Sheldon: Of course.
Leonard: Does it bother you?
Sheldon: No, it did at first. But then I talked it through with Frank and Alicia, and they really helped put things into perspective.
Leonard: Who are these people?
Sheldon: Leonard, friends are like toilet paper. It's good to have extras under the sink.

Raj: Yeah, okay, just do me a favor and stop talking about how great Claire is.
Zack: Anything for you, my little foreign friend.

Raj: Hey, dude, you're killing me with Claire.
Zack: What are you talking about?
Raj: I mean, come on, look at you. You're classically handsome, you've got a swimmer's body. Next to you, I look like me.