Sheldon (to himself): Structure, constant structure, one atom.
Howard: Boy, he's really gone, isn't he?
Leonard: Yeah, this morning he used a stick of butter as deodorant.
Howard: I thought I smelled popcorn.

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Howard: I invented a game. Want to play?
Leonard: Sure.
Howard: It's called Emily or Cinnamon. I give you actual quotes I've heard Raj say, and you guess if he was talking to his girlfriend or his dog.

Bernadette: Does your mother call you every day at work to see if you had a healthy lunch?
Howard: My mother calls me every day at work to see if I had a healthy bowel movement.

Leonard: Penny, I told you if you don't put him in his crate at night, he just runs around the apartment.

Raj: Okay, just to be clear, roller skating was my idea, and I'm very unhappy that you turned it into a double date. I hope you both fall on your asses and break your coccyxes.
Sheldon: The plural of coccyx is coccyges.
Raj: Screw you. Give me back my lima beans.

Penny: What happened?
Leonard: Sheldon's escaped and he's terrorizing the village.