Leonard: Did you know Raj moved out last night?
Penny: What? Why?
Leonard: "Leonard and Penny, I'm sorry for all the trouble I've caused. I went to stay at Howard's. P.S. Cinnamon's with me, but if you feel like messing with Sheldon, tell him she's loose in the building."

Raj: Amy, good luck getting these guys excited about a dinner with a theme. I gave up when no one cared about my Tom Hanks-Giving.

Raj: Oh man, first monster I see I'm gonna sneak up behind him, whip out my wand and shoot my magic all over his ass!
Stuart: Do you hear yourself when you say these things?

Raj: Doesn't anyone have a rod of resurrection? Because if you've got one, I need it bad. Get in here with your rod and give it to me.
Stuart: Okay, you need to say these things in your head before you say them out loud.

Raj: I'm sorry, guys. Sheldon was upset, Leonard and Penny were fighting. I just wanted to go someplace where I wasn't causing problems.
Howard: (sighs) I'll say it again. India.

Sheldon: What if she's correct? Doesn't that say something troubling about us?
Amy: I don't know. I just think you're the kind of person who likes a contingency plan.
Sheldon: That is true. Did you know I figured out in which order I would eat all my friends in the event of an apocalypse?
Amy: You need to stop hanging out with your brain so much. It's not a good influence.

Penny: Well, it's like that science thing. For every action, you have a gigantic and annoying reaction.
Leonard: Just when I thought you couldn't get any hotter.