Raj: It's not so bad, really. At least these trains have modern plumbing. In India, you squat over a hole in the train and expose your naked buttocks to the chilly air of Rajasthan.
Sheldon: He is referring, of course, to third class on Indian Railways' magnificent Ranakpur Express and its twelve hundred kilometer journey from Maharashtra to the Bikaner Junction.
Leonard: Oh, look, now he's boring on an international scale.

Leonard: Penny, as a scientist, my job is to figure out why things happen. But I don't think I'll ever understand how someone like me could get to be with someone like you. You know maybe I don't need to understand it, I just need to be grateful. I love you, Penny.

Leonard: What would you be if you were attached to another object by an inclined plane, wrapped helically around an axis?
Sheldon: Screwed?
Leonard: There you go.

Leonard: My point is, while you're spending all this time on your own, building computers or practicing your cello, what you're really doing is becoming interesting. When people finally do notice you, they're gonna find someone a lot cooler than they thought. And for those of you that were popular in high school, it's over, sorry. Thank you. Congratulations.

Sheldon: She calls me moon-pie because I'm nummy-nummy and she could just eat me up.

Leonard: Well, it looks like you're caught between a rock and a crazy place.
Sheldon: I hate when that happens.

Sheldon: No one calls me Moon Pie but Meemaw.