Stuart Bloom Quotes Page 4 of 12

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Quote from the episode The Escape Hatch Identification

Bernadette: Nobody needs a mooch living in their house forever.
Stuart: Hey, that's no way to talk about your baby.

Quote from the episode The Comic-Con Conundrum

Raj: I can't believe Penny's gonna get to go, and I'm not.
Sheldon: You can always watch the panels online. Oh, boy, we do say that a lot.
Stuart: "Panels." Just wanted to be included.

Quote from the episode The Comic-Con Conundrum

Stuart: Okay, I can give you 20 bucks for the whole box.
Raj: But you charged me hundreds for this stuff. I know.
Stuart: And I did it with a straight face.

Quote from the episode The Comic-Con Conundrum

Stuart: I'll give you 25 bucks. That's my best offer.
Raj: I have no choice.
Stuart: You know, if you want to make extra money, I could throw some work your way.
Raj: Really? I'll do anything.
Stuart: Great, you're hired. First thing you can do is put price tags on these. Start the little ones at $50.

Quote from the episode The Comic-Con Conundrum

Howard: This is for you.
Raj: What's this?
Bernadette: It's back pay for all the babysitting and taking care of Halley you've done.
Howard: There's more than enough in there to cover Comic-Con.
Stuart: Um, I also take care of Halley.
Bernadette: And you live here for free.
Stuart: I do, ma'am, thank you, ma'am.

Quote from the episode The Comic-Con Conundrum

Raj: As much as I appreciate this, I can't accept it. Okay? Halley's my goddaughter, I don't take care of her for money.
Stuart: I would.

Quote from the episode The Locomotion Reverberation

Raj: Okay, you ladies have fun tonight.
Stuart: Don't worry about Halley. Uncle Stuart's on the job.
Raj: Under the careful supervision of her godfather.
Stuart: My apologies. I didn't mean to offend you, Don Corleone.

Quote from the episode The Locomotion Reverberation

Stuart: So we just throw this away?
Raj: What else are you gonna do with it? Put it in your coffee?
Stuart: Well, I don't take it black.

Quote from the episode The Holiday Summation

Leonard: How did you get the baby to stop crying?
Stuart: Oh, I just talked to her. I've been told the sound of my voice puts people to sleep.

Quote from the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Bernadette: How could you?!
Howard: We made it this far without knowing, and you ruined it!
Raj: Well, you guys have no idea how hard it is to know something like this and not say it!
Stuart: You told me it was a girl, and I didn't say it.
Bernadette: Raj!
Raj: You were supposed to keep that to yourself.
Stuart: Oh, yeah. I guess it is hard.

Quote from the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Howard: Stuart, stop driving like an old man. Speed it up a little.
Stuart: I'm not an old man! I just can't see at night.

Quote from the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Bernadette: (To Howard) I'm so thirsty. Give me more ice chips.
Stuart: (munching on ice chips) Sorry. I thought these were room ice chips.

Quote from the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Leonard: Sorry, Stuart.
Stuart: Hey, I'm in a hospital and I'm not the patient. I'm fine.

Quote from the episode The Property Division Collision

Bernadette: Stuart, you didn't have to get us a baby gift.
Stuart: Oh, just homemade coupons for things you might need help with before the baby gets here. Going to the grocery store, driving you to the doctor. If you're not in a hurry, I can dig you a koi pond.
Bernadette: A foot massage?
Stuart: And that's not me being creepy, that's for either of you.

Quote from the episode The Property Division Collision

Stuart: Uh, now that you mention it can I live here?
Bernadette: Stuart, we'd love to help you out, but this a bad time; we're about to have a baby.
Stuart: Or is that why this is a great time? Think about it. When that baby comes, you're gonna need all the help you can get.
Bernadette: Thank you, but I'm not really sure.
Howard: Hang on, maybe it's not the worst idea. I mean, he did do a good job taking care of my mother.
Stuart: That woman didn't get heat rash once with me on powder patrol.

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