Leonard: And the noise complaint we got for singing you"Happy Birthday"?
Sheldon: As a friend, I was touched. As a representative of the building, I thought that you should pick a key and stick with it.

Amy: Why didn't you tell me?
Sheldon: 'Cause I wanted to make sure that you loved the man, not the office.

Leonard: You can't just declare yourself president.
Sheldon: I didn't. I called a meeting, I was the only one to attend. I nominated myself, and after a pretty moving speech, I voted myself in.

Sheldon: Not so fast. I believe we have one tenant here who has not made her voice heard.
Amy: Oh.
Sheldon: We're waiting, fiancée.
Penny: Yeah, we're waiting, best friend.
Leonard: Yeah, we're waiting, neighbor who needed a battery and totally got one from me, no strings attached.

Penny: Ugh, I can't believe my best friend sided with Sheldon.
Leonard: Can't believe my best friend is Sheldon.

Penny: What?
Amy: Don't be mad at me. I mean, I can't vote against him.
Leonard: Even when he's being crazy?
Amy: Well, what other times are there?!

Howard: But this time-
Stuart: It was me. Yeah. I was trying out a flirty new smile.
Howard: Now, I don't use the word "ghoulish" a lot, but I-I just can't think of another word.

Amy: Hi. What are you doing?
Sheldon: Leonard and Penny are trying to turn the tenants against me, so they are about to see just what kind of power the president of the tenants association wields.
Amy: "You must be at least this tall to use washing machine"?
Sheldon: I'm gonna hang it up higher than Leonard. And then his clothes will smell. And nobody's voting for a man with smelly clothes. No, not when there's a perfectly unscented incumbent on the ballot.

Leonard: Hey, Sheldon. We found something pretty interesting.
Amy: Huh. Well, that is surprising. I, for one, have no idea what they're talking about.
Leonard: Turns out, when Amy took over Penny's apartment, she was put on the lease, not you.
Penny: Yeah, and when I moved across the hall, you got taken off the lease and I got added.
Amy: Well, what are you saying? That Sheldon's not technically a tenant at all and therefore, has no standing to be president of the tenants association no matter who votes for him? I don't know how you found that out, but I am guessing all on your own.

Leonard: So, looks like we need to figure out who the new president should be. I nominate myself.
Penny: I second it.
Amy: Huh. Well, as a woman in love, I want to stand by my man. Too bad that's been rendered bureaucratically impossible.

Amy: I'm sorry, Sheldon, but with minimal power comes minimal responsibility. And you couldn't handle it.

Raj: You're like Grey's Anatomy for robots. Also, why isn't that a show?

Bernadette: Aren't you worried there's some kid out there missing his drone?
Raj: Oh, please. This is not a children's toy. This thing's got an HD camera on it.
Bernadette: Aren't you worried that there's some rich peeping tom out there missing his drone?

Sheldon: Why are you wearing a Band-Aid?
Raj: Halley bit me.
Leonard: (laughs) You got beaten up by a girl.
Howard: Hey, that's sexist.
Leonard: You're right. (laughs) You got beaten up by a baby.

Leonard: Hey. What you got there?
Penny: Oh, I grabbed a sandwich at the food truck out front.
Sheldon: Wait, n-now, hold on. Tonight is Friday, and I believe you know what that means.
Penny: That my fun, young life took a drastic turn somewhere?
Sheldon: No.
Leonard: But yeah.