Leonard: Oh, don't slam the-
Sheldon: Don't slam the [gasps] That was exhilarating.

Amy: Do you want to go back to the apartment and see me try on my dress?
Sheldon: Shouldn't I see it for the first time at the Nobel ceremony?
Amy: It's not a wedding.
Sheldon: Okay. Well, give me a minute to think of another reason I don't want to see it.

Penny: Pickled herring. Who knew how good it was!
Leonard: Really? Sounds gross.
Penny: Looks gross. Smells gross. It's delicious! [knock on door] Ooh, that might be my salted cod!

Leonard: What?
Amy: Sheldon has something he'd like to say.
Sheldon: I'm sorry I didn't react appropriately. You and Penny are bringing new life into the world. Congratulations. I can't wait to meet it.
Leonard: "It"?
Sheldon: That's a gender-neutral pronoun. If you're offended, take it up with the English language.

Sarah Michelle Gellar: Just to be clear, this isn't a date.
Raj: Yeah, I know.
Sarah Michelle Gellar: Then why are you holding my hand?

Penny: Well, thank you guys so much for the clothes and the shoes, the plane tickets. You've been so generous.
Amy: Well, it's important that all of our friends get to share this moment with us.
Sheldon: And then for years to come, you can tell others you had a front-row seat to history. Although, technically, I think your seats are in the second row.

Amy: How about this: you can practice your acceptance speech while I try on the dress.
Sheldon: Ah, great. You can help me whittle it down to 90 minutes.

Leonard: Excuse me, but if I recall, you're the one who went out drinking with Sheldon, then came home and attacked me.
Penny: Attacked you? I said, "Do you wanna?"
Leonard: Yeah. I was helpless.
Penny: Uh-huh.
Leonard: So do you wanna?
Penny: Well, I can't get more pregnant.
Leonard: Mm-hmm. We'll see about that.

Howard: Somebody just peed in the big girl potty.
Bernadette: Oh, I'm so proud! It was her, right?
Howard: Yes.

Howard: You still feel good about leaving them with Stuart and Denise for a couple days?
Bernadette: I guess. I just hope we don't miss Michael's first words.
Howard: Or Stuart's last words.

Bert: You really think walking her is gonna help me meet girls?
Raj: Cinnamon is chick bait.
Bert: Good. 'Cause I'm not.

Sheldon: Amy, why don't you kick us off.
Amy: Thank you. "The challenging climate of Scandinavia has left its mark on the Swedish character. These dour, latter-day Vikings are slow to warm up to strangers, but if you follow a few easy steps, a Swede can be your friend for life."

Sheldon: Yes, Penny?
Penny: Oh. Do we have to go?

Sheldon: Hello? What did we just learn about the end of business meetings? [everyone groans as they shake each other's hands]

Howard: I was just looking at the map. Couldn't help thinking: we're here and they're there, and if anything happened, we'd have to go here to get all the way back there.
Bernadette: Why are you trying to freak me out?
Howard: This is our vacation. I thought we should do things together.