*Sheldon is using a map of the U.S. to find out where he can move*
Sheldon: Penny, you're from Nebraska, right?
Penny: Born and raised.
*Sheldon crosses out Nebraska*

Sheldon: I do not have to urinate. I am the master of my own bladder. Drat.

Sheldon: My new computer came with Windows 7. Windows 7 is much more user-friendly than Windows Vista. I don't like that.

Penny: I can't believe it. if I hadn't been working the dinner shift, I would've run right into the robbers.
Leonard: Hey, there's no reason for you to be scared.
Penny: I'm not scared. I would've gone all Nebraska on their asses.

Sheldon: It's all right, they didn't take my comic books.

Sheldon: And look over here, "shrimp in mobster sauce". What is mobster sauce?
Leonard: It's obviously a typo.
Sheldon: Perhaps. Perhaps this restaurant's now a front for organized crime. For all we know, the mobster sauce contains actual chunks of deceased mobsters.
Raj: No, no, no, no. I think it just means it's the kind of sauce that mobsters like.
Howard: It doesn't mean any of that. It's a typo!

Sheldon: You know, the more I think about it, the mobster sauce couldn't possible contain chunks of mobster.
Leonard: And why is that?
Sheldon: It was listed under sea food.

Sheldon: Would you like me to bring you some warm milk?
Leonard: I'm lactose intolerant.
Sheldon: And you don't wish to alarm me with any more loud noises. Very thoughtful.

Sheldon: (To a policeman) They took our TV, two laptops, four external hard-drives, our PS2, our PS3, our X-Box, our X-Box 360, our classic Nintendo, our Super Nintendo, our Nintendo 64 and our Wii.
Leonard: We like games.
Sheldon: Right, games. They took Halo 1, Halo 2, Halo 3, Call of Duty 1, Call of Duty 2, Call of Duty 3, Rock Band, Rock Band 2, Final Fantasy 1 thru 9, The Legend of Zelda, The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, Super Mario Brothers, Super Mario Galaxy, Mario and Sonic at the Winter Olympics and Ms. Pacman.
Policeman: (Writing down) Assorted video games.

Sheldon: I'm fine. Although I'm no longer master of my own bladder.

Sheldon: You know, the more I think about it, the mobster sauce couldn't possibly contain chunks of mobster.
Leonard: And why is that?
Sheldon: It was listed under seafood.
Leonard: What if they were mobsters who slept with the fishes?
Sheldon: Leonard, are we having a serious conversation or not?

Howard: Now, inside, we've got motion detectors, infrared sensors, and cameras connected to a server running state-of-the-art facial recognition software.
Leonard: Where did you get all this stuff?
Howard: I got a buddy over at the Department of Defense.
Leonard: He just gave it to you?
Howard: I'm sure he would have if I had asked. Ironically, their security isn't all that good.

Sheldon: Wonderful security system if we're attacked by a school of tuna.
Howard: Don't worry, the net's going to be electrified. Picture her on the floor, spasming uncontrollably.
Sheldon: Better.

Leonard: God, Sheldon. What the hell are you doing out there?
Sheldon: I heard a noise.
Leonard: It was us. We knocked over a lamp.
Sheldon: Why would you knock over a lamp?
Leonard: We were going to have...
Penny: He doesn't need to know what we were doing, Leonard.
Sheldon: Oh! No, she's right, I don't need to know what you were doing. Carry on.

Howard: Oh, come on. So you were the victim of a crime. That's part of life. When my great-grandfather first came to this country, he put all his hopes and dreams into this little butcher shop he ran on the Lower East Side of New York. You know what happened? Every customer who walked into that butcher shop and asked for a pound of liver, got ripped off. But, those people moved on, and so should you.