Ira Flatow: Some people in the science community are calling it the wonder blunder.
Sheldon: Who? Give my their names! I bet it's Wolowitz.

Sheldon: To really understand the story here, we need to start at the very beginning. A small town in East Texas where a young genuis named -
Leonard: - Sheldon!
Sheldon: Yes, that's right, Sheldon Cooper. He was bitten by his neighbor's dog, leading to his first scientific break through: the Doggy Death Ray. Which sadly he couldn't build because Santa wouldn't bring him enriched uranium.

Barry Kripke: Cooper, maybe physics just isn't your thing. Have you ever considered a career in retail? Then you could take things back for a living.

Barry Kripke: There he is! It's my favorite superhero, The Retractor.

Sheldon: Yes, I'd be a physicist with a Nobel Prize in chemistry. Everyone laugh at the circus freak.

Wil Wheaton: Well not everybody felt that way. A lot of people really hated the character and some of them hated me because of it. I would do interviews and people would be mean to me.
Sheldon: That just happened to me. Next time you're stuck for a tweet, feel free to say what a jerk Ira Flatow is.

Ira Flatow: You know, I'd really like to hear from Dr. Hofstadter if it's all right with you.
Sheldon: What a surprise. Did you invite me back just so you could ignore me.
Ira Flatow: Actually, I didn't invite you. You came in, you took a seat, and I'm not comfortable with confrontation.

Amy: *knocks* Sheldon, can I come in?
Sheldon: Do you have cookies?
Amy: No.
Sheldon: Good, because I don't deserve cookies. Come in.

Sheldon: *On the phone with President Siebert* For your information, I have nine friends. Ten if we include you. ... Nine it is.
Sheldon: It's ten. I'll count Wolowitz.

Sheldon: This day just keeps on getting worse and worse.
Penny: You know, if it makes you feel any better ...
Sheldon: It probably won't.
Penny: You're probably right.

Sheldon: But none of you know what this is like. Being celebrated for something you wish you never did.
Penny: You clearly haven't been with me at Mardi Gras.

Ira Flatow: This is Science Friday, I'm Ira Flatow. My guest today is responsible for the discovery of the first stable super-heavy element.
Sheldon: Thank you. The university made me come here, I didn't want to. Big fan of the show.

Raj: Hey, when you got home today and complained about feeling sick from eating too many jelly beans, did I tell you how to fix it? No. I said "Aww, that must hurt." and I rubbed your belly.
Howard: I thought of you (Bernadette), the whole time.

Sheldon: Thank you. Ira, if I may, I'd like to aplogize for my behavior last week. Now, isn't there something you'd like to say to me?
Ira Flatow: No.

Sheldon: Here comes the Embarrassment Express. It stops at Fraudville, Wonder-Blunder-Berg and Kansas City, because it's a hub.