Sheldon: Oh, my goodness, she's coming to visit!
Leonard: Oh, it'll be nice to finally meet her.
Sheldon: Oh, you are going to love her. She is the kindest, sweetest woman you'll ever meet. Yeah, unless you're a gopher digging up her vegetable garden. In that case, you can expect to have your head bashed in with a shovel.

Sheldon: Look, let's all let's remain calm and analyze this situation. Now, I realize that you've only known each other for less than a day, but is it possible this crankiness is because your cycles have synced?
Meemaw: You leave the room and let the grown-ups talk. Now!
Amy: Don't speak to him like he's a child.
Sheldon: Thank you. Now, I'm gonna go next door and play with Leonard.

Meemaw: Young lady, if you think I don't know what it's like to live with a stubborn, egotistical man, then you're wrong. 'Cause that was my husband.
Amy: Really?
Meemaw: There were days I wanted to fill his pockets with corn and toss him in the pigpen.