Bernadette: Amy made me realize that new mothers are cognitively primed to take in new information, and I've been wasting it making up songs about our babies' toes.
Howard: To be fair, I cowrote "Pinky Toe, Pinky Toe."

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Josh: So, I have to ask, was the robot sexy?
Howard: It was actually just a mechanical hand.
Josh: 'Cause that's all you need, right?
Howard: You are my brother.

Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not cry.
Howard: That's true, you'd rust.

Sheldon: You know what they say, fool me "N" times, where "N" equals the amount of times you've already fooled me, shame on you. Fool me "N" plus one times, shame on me.

Penny: I'm not leaving you for Bill Gates.
Leonard: You sure? I bet his Internet's really fast.

Raj: But why do they still call Batman using the Bat-Signal? Wouldn't it just be, like, easier to text him?
Howard: The Bat-Signal isn't just to alert Batman, it's also to strike fear in the hearts of his enemies and let them know he's coming.
Leonard: Sort of like Sheldon's knock.
Sheldon: Comparing me to Batman? I'll take it.