Barry Kripke: Yes, yes, yes. He's a jolly good fellow. What time do the strippers arrive?

Barry Kripke: We're all pathetic and creepy, and can't get girls. That's why we fight robots.

Sheldon: No, that's okay. I can fight my own battles. Isn't that right, Bawwy?
Barry Kripke: Is that a reference to my speech impediment? That's pretty hurtful. I can't control it.
Sheldon: You're right. That was uncalled for. I take it back.
Barry Kripke: Of course you do, because you're The Retractor!

Howard: What do you think?
Barry Kripke: That ... is ... hilarious! Give me the remote control. I want to drive him into the girls' restroom.
Howard: All right, we're done. It's offensive.

Raj: When I moved to America I was pretty lonely, but when I met Howard my life changed because we could be lonely together.

Wil Wheaton: Oh, Internet. This is so going all over you.

Wil Wheaton: Well, it was either this or another hot tub party at George Takei's house.