Raj: Howard built a sex robot.
Howard: That is not true. All I did was build a robot.
Ms. Davis: Did it have six breasts?
Howard: I'm sorry, I'm a feminist, I don't notice things like how many breasts a robot has.

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Josh: So, I have to ask, was the robot sexy?
Howard: It was actually just a mechanical hand.
Josh: 'Cause that's all you need, right?
Howard: You are my brother.

Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not cry.
Howard: That's true, you'd rust.

Amy: I have a lab full of coked up monkeys with nothing to lose.

Sheldon: My father used to say that a woman is like an egg salad sandwich on a warm Texas day.
Alex: What?
Sheldon: Full of eggs and only appealing for a short time.

Alex: Is there a problem?
Sheldon: Let's not call it a problem. Let's call it an opportunity. To solve a serious problem.