Raj: I'm actually glad Lucy had to work tonight. Saved me the awkward conversation about how I was hanging with my bros.
Howard: Isn't every conversation you two have awkward?
Raj: Painfully so. We have this rule that if no one talks for three minutes, we can just hang up. So into her.

Raj: Amy, good luck getting these guys excited about a dinner with a theme. I gave up when no one cared about my Tom Hanks-Giving.

Raj: Oh man, first monster I see I'm gonna sneak up behind him, whip out my wand and shoot my magic all over his ass!
Stuart: Do you hear yourself when you say these things?

Raj: Doesn't anyone have a rod of resurrection? Because if you've got one, I need it bad. Get in here with your rod and give it to me.
Stuart: Okay, you need to say these things in your head before you say them out loud.

Sheldon: I've never played Dungeons and Dragons with girls.
Penny: It's okay, honey, no one has.

Howard: A satanic fungus that looks suspiciously like Al Pacino rises from the forest floor and says, (Imitating Al Pacino) "You're playing D&D. You're playing D&D. This whole apartment is playing D&D."

Amy: Go away. Sheldon is nibbling on my ... fourteen! Yes!