Leonard: Well, the only way we can play teams at this point is if we cut Raj in half.
Raj: Oh, sure, cut the foreigner in half. There's a billion more where he came from.

Raj: Amy, good luck getting these guys excited about a dinner with a theme. I gave up when no one cared about my Tom Hanks-Giving.

Raj: Oh man, first monster I see I'm gonna sneak up behind him, whip out my wand and shoot my magic all over his ass!
Stuart: Do you hear yourself when you say these things?

Raj: Doesn't anyone have a rod of resurrection? Because if you've got one, I need it bad. Get in here with your rod and give it to me.
Stuart: Okay, you need to say these things in your head before you say them out loud.

Penny: Wait. Wait, Sheldon come back, you forgot something.
Sheldon: What?
Penny: This plasma grenade. Ha! Look, it's raining you!

Leonard: Wow, Penny, you're on fire!
Penny: Yeah, so is Sheldon!

Penny: She'll have sex with anyone as long as they keep buying her things.
Howard: Really?
Penny: Yeah!
Howard: Yay! If you'll excuse me, I have some bar mitzvah bonds to cash.