Sheldon: Ugh.
Leonard: You okay?
Sheldon: No. No, all these comments online about Wil, they're nothing but supportive and kind. Where's the mean, snarky Internet that shows up every time I get a haircut?
Leonard: You know that's us, right?

Leonard: What would you be if you were attached to another object by an inclined plane, wrapped helically around an axis?
Sheldon: Screwed?
Leonard: There you go.

Leonard: Penny, as a scientist, my job is to figure out why things happen. But I don't think I'll ever understand how someone like me could get to be with someone like you. You know maybe I don't need to understand it, I just need to be grateful. I love you, Penny.

Sheldon: This song is never going to stop. Have you ever dealt with something so relentlessly irritating?
Leonard: That's a trick question, right?

Sheldon: Until next week, this is Professor Proton saying, 01000010 01111001 01100101. That's "Bye" in ASCII binary, or good-binary.

Amy: Well, what was wrong with it? You know, did you find it borderline psychotic? I mean, I liked that about it, but you guys discuss.

Sheldon: You can't be Professor Proton. You're not a scientist.
Wil Wheaton: Well, I was never on a starship, but pretending I was bought me this house. And if I'd pretended a little longer, it would have a swimming pool.