Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz Quotes Page 3 of 30

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Quote from the episode The Gates Excitation

Bernadette: God. What's happening? I'm a smart, educated, successful...
Amy: "Woman"?
Bernadette: I was gonna get it.

Quote from the episode The Gates Excitation

Amy: Don't be so hard on yourself. Pregnancy and childbirth actually cause physical changes to the structure of your brain.
Bernadette: I liked the old structure of my brain. But then, I liked a lot of my old structures.

Quote from the episode The Gates Excitation

Amy: Well, these are positive changes. Studies with rats show that new mothers are more sensitive to danger, better at multitasking and bolder in the pursuit of food.
Bernadette: I did stick a couple lamp chops in my purse.
Amy: So that's what I was smelling.

Quote from the episode The Gates Excitation

Amy: Look, even though your brain is different, in many ways, it's better.
Bernadette: But were you bored?
Amy: Of course not.
Bernadette: You're lying.
Amy: Which you can tell, because your maternal brain is better at sensing nonverbal cues.
Bernadette: Now you're just being condescending.
Amy: Look at you, two for two.

Quote from the episode The Gates Excitation

Bernadette: The sun is losing about six times ten to the 12th grams per second, so the fraction of the mass it loses every year is about ten to the negative 13th. But don't worry. It'll be millions of years before we all freeze to death. Sweet dreams.

Quote from the episode The Gates Excitation

Bernadette: Evolution gave me this mom brain to focus on the baby, but I figure I can hack it to learn all kinds of new things.
Howard: Well, that's great.
Bernadette: Yeah. There was a problem, and I fixed it.
Howard: Like Bob the Builder in that giraffe cage.
Bernadette: Spoiler alert. I didn't see that one yet.

Quote from the episode The Gates Excitation

Bernadette: Evolution gave me this mom brain to focus on the baby, but I figure I can hack it to learn all kinds of new things.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Bernadette: When I went by the office they gave me coffee and cookies and no one peed on me. I miss that so much.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Howard: Oh, good, you're here. There's (clears throat) something I want to talk to you about.
Bernadette: We're not putting a TV in the bathroom. That's how you get hemorrhoids.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Howard: Uh, I was thinking maybe one of us should stay home full-time, with the kids.
Bernadette: Oh great, so I have to give up my job and everything I've worked for?
Howard: Actually, I was thinking I should stay home.
Bernadette: Oh, so I have to abandon my children and go back to work, while you get to stay home and bond with them?
Howard: You just said you didn't want to.
Bernadette: No, I don't want to have to, but if I want to, I should get to.
Howard: Do you want to?
Bernadette: Maybe I do.
Howard: What if I also want to?
Bernadette: Well, I don't know, we can't both stay home.
Howard: Don't you think you should go back to work, because you make more money?
Bernadette: Don't you think you should make more money?
Howard: I think it's pretty sexist of you to say a dad can't stay home with his children.
Bernadette: You know what else is sexist, the phrase "suck it", yet here we are.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Bernadette: Howard, we both know you can't keep up this pace. By this afternoon you're gonna be passed out on the couch and I'm gonna have three exhausted babies to deal with.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Bernadette: Gerald, what's going on? Hope you're not screwing up my research. You calling from a bike ride? 'Cause you're backpedaling hard.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Bernadette: Howie? Howie, wake up. It's time.
Howard: Oh. Did your water break?
Bernadette: No.
Howard: Are you feeling any contractions?
Bernadette: No.
Howard: Wait. Well, where are you going?
Bernadette: To the hospital. Today's my due date, and this crap needs to end now.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Bernadette: What are you doing?
Howard: I'm making the situation better with humor.
Bernadette: Are you?
Howard: Would you rather me make it better with magic?
Bernadette: Go back to sleep.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Penny: You know, when my yoga instructor was pregnant, she told me there are tons of poses that put her right into labor.
Bernadette: I'll try, but I feel like bendy poses are what got me into this mess.

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