Mike Rostenkowski: Your new mother-in-law's a piece of work.
Bernadette: Not now, Dad.
Mike Rostenkowski: She's got a bigger mustache than me.

Mike Rostenkowski: That's what you're wearing?
Howard: No good? The guy at the sporting goods store said these are what fishermen wear.
Mike Rostenkowski: Maybe in cartoons.

Howard: So, what do we do now? They expect us to go away for the weekend.
Mike Rostenkowski: Ah. There's an Indian casino near Palm Springs. You know how to shoot craps?
Howard: No, but I'm not a stranger to dice games. I was the Temple Beth-El Hebrew School Yahtzee champion.
Mike Rostenkowski: Mazel tov. I'll teach you how to play.