Penny: Tweety Bird tawt he taw a what?
Sheldon: A romulan.
Penny: Yes, he tawt he taw a romulan.

Penny: I finally realize I don't need to be famous or have some big career to be happy.
Leonard: Well what do you need?
Penny: You, you stupid Poptart.

Penny: What up moonpie!

Penny: Do or do not do there is no try.
Leonard: Did you just quote Star Wars?
Penny: I believe I quoted The Empire Strikes Back.

Penny: That top has paid off in free drinks 10 times what I originally paid for it.
Sheldon: Yes, Penny has a lot of money tied up in promiscuity futures.

Penny: Sorry, Stallion. Your weird friend Giraffe is here.

Sheldon: I need your help in a matter of semiotics.
Penny: What?
Sheldon: Semiotics, the study of signs and symbols as a branch of the philosophy related to linguistics.
Penny: Okay, honey, I know you think you are explaining yourself, but you're really not.

Penny: That's the saddest thing I've ever heard.
Howard: (to Leonard) Go ahead. Tell her about your senior prom.

Penny: You can't let her get into your head.
Leonard: It's too late for me, my head is her summer house.

Penny: Next time I get a speeding ticket, here come the waterworks.
Sheldon: Here come the waterworks!
*Sheldon runs off to the bathroom*
Leonard: Aren't you going to ask?
Penny: What is this, my first day?

Leonard: So, should we talk about setting a date?
Penny: Well, I'd like to choose one that works with my brother's schedule.
Leonard: Right and when would that be?
Penny: Twelve to eighteen months from now, depending on good behavior.

Sheldon: Why would you have surgery?
Leonard: Because I can't breathe. I snore. I get sinus infections.
Penny: Back off, he's all mine.

Penny: You're building a particle detector using super-fluid helium.
Leonard: You know, when you talk like that, I want to take you right here on this table.
Penny: And you know from past experience, this table can not support both our weight.

Amy: Whatever happened to that ape movie you were in?
Penny: Oh, God. Probably nothing. I think I saw the director twirling a sign outside the Verizon store.

Penny: I really thought he was going to say "let it go".