Howard: I just want to let you know I get why you don't want me to be a part of the planetarium show.
Raj: Oh, great. Thanks for stopping by.
Howard: You don't want to talk about the stars next to an actual astronaut. That would be like doing karaoke with a rock star.
Raj: First of all, I've totally done karaoke with a rock star. Or are you forgetting when the Spin Doctors handed me the mic at the Orange County Fair?

Andrea: Raj, you should have Howard join you for one of your shows.
Howard: Oh, that might be fun.
Raj: It might be, but with two small children at home and a full-time job, I'm sure you're too busy.
Howard: No, I could find the time.
Raj: Well, you don't have to decide right now.
Howard: It's okay, I-
Raj: He can't do it.

Raj: Oh, Howard, uh, this is Andrea. She's the director of the planetarium.
Andrea: Hi.
Howard: Nice to meet you. I'm Howard Wolowitz. Engineer, husband, father, astronaut.
Andrea: Really? You're an astronaut?
Howard: Well, I don't like to brag.
Raj: Hmm, yeah, but somehow, you manage.

Raj: Recently, 12 new moons were discovered orbiting Jupiter, bringing the total up to 79.
As a middle child myself, I'd like to extend my sympathies to moons two through 78. Your grandpa will never learn your name. I'd like to thank you for joining me on this journey through the stars. If you enjoyed this lecture, please come back Thursday for the exact same one.

Raj: What the hell did you two say to Anu?
Bernadette: Uh, whatever do you mean?
Raj: Why, why would you tell her I wear ladies' deodorant?
Penny: Uh, because you're a boy and it's really funny.
Raj: Oh, oh, okay. Pardon me for having the confidence to smell daisy-fresh.

Tam: Sheldon! So good to see you!
Sheldon: Tam.
Tam: It's been a long time.
Sheldon: Mm, not long enough to erase the sting of betrayal.
Tam: How did I betray you?
Sheldon: You know what you did.
Raj: Uh, let me catch you up. He does not.

Tam: So, is he here?
Leonard: Uh, no. He didn't come. He's, uh, he's still pretty upset about ... you know.
Tam: I know what?
Leonard: Come on, you-you must know.
Tam: No, we haven't talked in, like, 20 years.
Howard: Right. Because ... you know.
Raj: I don't think he knows.
Tam: What are you guys talking about?
Leonard: Why did you and Sheldon stop being friends? What did you do?
Raj: And don't worry, even though we just met you, we think you're right and he's wrong.

Howard: I wonder what Tam could have done.
Raj: Hmm. Well, if Sheldon doesn't want to talk about it, it's got to be pretty upsetting.
Howard: I have his brother George's number, he might know.
Leonard: Really? You have George's number?
Raj: So so jealous!

Raj: Guys, I need your help, okay? I'm trying to buy her engagement ring. What do you think of this? Do you think she'll like this one?
Bernadette: Well, it's hard to say, not knowing much about her. Does she have fingers?
Raj: Yes, she has ten fingers and ten toes. Probably. I'll get back to you after I see her in sandals.

Anu: Raj. I know we don't know each other very well, but you seem like you'd make a good father and you're tall enough so I can wear heels and I think that's something worth fighting for. Will you marry me?
Raj: (stammering) Oh, my God, oh, my God. Yes, of course, of course I'll marry you!
Anu: If you'd like to kiss me you can.
Raj: Oh, great.
Anu: I should warn you I have a tongue piercing.
Raj: Oh, you're not that nice. (laughs)

Anu: I guess if we're going forward with this wedding, we should talk about the next steps.
Raj: Oh, like themes and flowers?
Anu: Actually, finances and taxes.
Raj: Oh. We can't use that. That was the theme of my parents' divorce.

Anu: I told my parents our first date went well and they got very excited.
Raj: Oh, tell me about it. My parents were so thrilled, they actually spoke to each other. So that was a disaster.

Howard: Hey. Mind if I sit?
Raj: Did you just come here to tell me I'm making a gigantic mistake by having this blueberry muffin and I should've got a cinnamon roll like you did?
Howard: No.
Raj: Good, 'cause I'm happy with my choice. Although that cinnamon roll does smell good if you're open to halfsies.

Raj: Why can't you just be happy for me?
Howard: Because you're being dumb. You don't know anything about her.
Raj: Well, how come you all get to be married and I have to stay single?
Howard: I think that's a question for a licensed professional.
Raj: You know what, you're not just insulting me. Okay? You're insulting my family, my culture and my future bride, Anu, a vegetarian with a master's degree from Cornell whose favorite fruit is pineapple.

Howard: Wait, you're not seriously marrying a woman you've met once.
Raj: Why not? She's nice, I'm nice. We're just as likely to be happy as any other two people. Maybe even happier. (to Leonard) Sorry, that was not a swipe at you.
Leonard: I didn't think it was.
Raj: Yeah, good, 'cause it was not.