Quotes from ‘The Solo Oscillation’

The Solo Oscillation

'The Solo Oscillation' - Season 11, Episode 13

After Sheldon decides to work solo without Amy, she turns to Leonard to work together on a series of science experiments. Meanwhile, geologist Bert replaces Howard in Footprints on the Moon, while Sheldon gets an unexpected source of scientific inspiration from Penny.

Air Date: January 11, 2018.

Quote from Raj

Raj: Hey! Look what I got everybody.
Leonard: Newspapers? Did you find a portal back to the 1990s?
Penny: No. If he had that, he'd be trying to prevent NSYNC from breaking up.
Raj: Oh, please. I'm glad they broke up. Otherwise, Justin would never have brought sexy back.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: One thing you can't get on an iPad, the smell of ink and paper. One more reason iPads are better.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Oh, look, they still have Far Side. Oh, I don't get that one.
Amy: Oh, he's pushing when he should be pulling.
Sheldon: Hmm. I don't think he belongs in that gifted school, then.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: What are you doing?
Penny: Making a boat. When I was a kid, my dad showed me how.
Leonard: Boy, you'll do anything to avoid reading.

Quote from Raj

Raj: Guys, it's under "Things to do this weekend."
Amy: I can't find it. What does it say?
Raj: That it's a thing to do this weekend.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Well, how nice. Everyone's doing impressive work.
Leonard: What have you been working on these days?
Sheldon: Whoa, whoa. Where'd that come from?
Leonard: Where did what come from?
Sheldon: (stammers) I try to be supportive, and you break out the hot lights and the rubber hose.
Leonard: I just asked what you've been working on.
Sheldon: Oh, my God, let it go. Do you believe this guy?

Quote from Amy

Amy: Okay, how do you want to play this? Do you want to pretend like nothing's bothering you and blow up later, or do you just want to be a maniac right now?

Quote from Amy

Sheldon: I have a confession. When I berated Leonard, it was a clever ruse to conceal the fact that I'm not working on anything.
Amy: Well, I think I speak for everyone when I say, "No!"

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: Well, maybe this is the perfect opportunity to take some time for yourself and refocus. I'm sure you'll find something you're excited about.
Sheldon: Thank you, Amy. I don't know what I'd do without you.
[cut to Amy entering Apartment 4A]
Amy: Hey, can I stay here? Sheldon kicked me out.

Quote from Howard

Raj: Hey, uh, what do you think we should open our show with? Uh, "Thor and Doctor Jones" or "Let's Get Astrophysical"
Howard: I don't know. I think we should start with something that gets them up on their feet. Maybe "Sherlock Around the Clock."

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Okay. Scratch paper, check. Whiteboard, check. Chex Mix, check. And here we go.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: [cell phone rining] Oh, dang it. Hello, Mother.
Mary Cooper: Hi there, Shelly. You will never believe who I ran into at the barbecue festival.
Sheldon: I am right in the middle of some very important work. I don't have time for this right now.
Mary Cooper: Then why did you answer the phone?
Sheldon: Because you raised me to be polite. Now stop bothering me. [hangs up]

Quote from Sheldon

Mary Cooper: Hello again.
Sheldon: Who did you see at the barbecue festival?
Mary Cooper: Mr. Watkins.
Sheldon: Really? You called me and interrupted my work to tell me that you ran into somebody you could plausibly run into? I'm sorry, Mother, I really need to focus here. I will speak to you next week.
Mary Cooper: Okay, sweetheart. I'll talk to you then.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: (sighs) I thought Mr. Watkins moved to Florida.
Mary Cooper: He did. He was back visiting his son.
Sheldon: Oh, gosh darn it, that is interesting. Was it Tommy or Joe? I bet it was Joe, 'cause he and Tommy had a falling out over that time-share.

Quote from Leonard

Raj: You guys do anything fun after dinner?
Leonard: Well, actually Amy came back over and we hung out. Did you know that we're both spelling bee champs? We stayed up for hours trying to stump each other.
Raj: Who won?
Leonard: Oh, she thought she had me with "appoggiatura" but I shut that down expeditiously. E-X-P-E-D-I-T-I-O-U-S-L-Y. Expeditiously.

Quote from Raj

Raj: Wow. I bet that made Penny take off all of her clothes. ... Put her pajamas on and then go to bed early.
Leonard: At, like, 9:00.

Quote from Raj

Howard: I don't want to be the one who breaks up the band. You know, maybe you should think about replacing me.
Raj: Okay.
Howard: I mean, I know it'll be hard since we-
Raj: Oh, I bet Bert could do it. He plays guitar. I'm gonna go ask him.

Quote from Howard

Leonard: I guess he forgot that I play the cello.
Howard: I-I don't think he did.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: Okay, I think it's ready.
Amy: Should we put on safety goggles?
Leonard: Well, the funnest fun is the safest fun, so yes.

Quote from Amy

Penny: So what's all this?
Leonard: Well, Amy and I were talking about old science fair projects, and how fun it would be to recreate them.
Amy: We're making hot ice.
Leonard: It's pretty cool.
Amy: (chuckles) Nice one. (Amy and Leonard high five)

Quote from Amy

Leonard: I'm sorry, we don't have to do more experiments. Let's do something we can all enjoy.
Amy: Hey, uh, you want to watch that show you like where people want to buy a house and then they do?

Quote from Penny

Penny: No, no, you guys do your experiments. I'll go pick up dinner.
Leonard: Are you sure?
Penny: Yeah, you're having science fun, and I don't want to interfere, or watch you.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Did I actually do it? I did. I did. [picks up his phone and dials] The answer is one in 18 million.
Mary Cooper: What is?
Sheldon: The odds of you running into Mr. Watkins.

Quote from Sheldon

Mary Cooper: Oh, Shelly. I have bad news. Mr. Watkins passed this morning.
Sheldon: Oh. Oh, I'm-I'm sorry.
Mary Cooper: I know. What are the odds of that?
Sheldon: Call you back.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: [3 knocks] Sheldon? [3 knocks] Sheldon? [3 knocks] Sheldon?
Sheldon: It's annoying when you do it.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I have been working pretty hard. I could use a break.
Penny: What's that?
Sheldon: Oh, yeah, that is an experiment to see how many parallelograms I could draw while holding my breath.
Penny: [pointing to the board] Is that where you blacked out?
Sheldon: [pointing behind the couch] No, actually, that's where I blacked out.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: And this?
Sheldon: That is a list of all the different types of natural disasters.
Penny: "Fire-quake"?
Sheldon: I made that one up. Which I shouldn't have, because now I'm scared of it.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: Maybe I'll just eat this in the laundry room.
Sheldon: No, no. Wait. You don't have to go, as long as you sit quietly and don't say anything.

Quote from Bert

Bert: Hey, you want to hear one of my geology songs?
Raj: So it's about rocks?
Bert: Better. It's about a boulder.
Raj: Isn't that the same thing?
Bert: Far from it. A boulder has a diameter greater than 25.6 centimeters.
Raj: Is that fact in the song?
Bert: No ... yes.

Quote from Bert

Bert: Alone in my temple in the middle of Peru, A giant stone ball with nothing much to do, But if you steal my idol, I will roll right over you, 'Cause I'm six tons of granite and micaceous schist, Yeah, I'm six tons of granite and,
Both: Micaceous schist, Yeah, I'm six tons of granite and, micaceous schist, Yeah, I'm six tons of granite And, uh, micaceous schist Yeah, I'm six-

Quote from Amy

Leonard: So, I think if we want to predict the height of the wave, we need to use elasticity theory and model the lattice as one continuous flexible piece.
Amy: This is fun.
Leonard: Mm-hmm.
Amy: Playing with Popsicle sticks, exploring ways to store kinetic energy. It's like preschool all over again.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: Except now if I eat paste, it's because I want to, not because Craig Schultz is making me.
Amy: Hey, can I ask you a question?
Leonard: Is it, "Where was the teacher?" She was in the bathroom smoking, that's where.
Amy: It wasn't, but I'm glad to see you've moved on.

Quote from Amy

Amy: I was gonna ask if being married felt any different.
Leonard: Oh, uh, not really. Sorry. That probably wasn't the answer you were looking for.
Amy: No, actually it is. I mean, Sheldon and I are in a really great place right now, and I just, I don't want anything to mess that up.
Leonard: Mm-hmm. You do remember you're here because he kicked you out of your apartment?
Amy: Yes. His work is important to him. It's one of the things I find the sexiest about him. Well, that and-
Leonard: Aah! [setting off the lattice]
Amy: - his butt.
Leonard: Ugh.

Quote from Penny

Sheldon: And then I was thinking about inventing a new dark matter particle to evade the omega baryon constraints, but that just seems like something anyone could come up with.
Penny: Mm. Agreed. You know what's blowing my mind? Somebody thought about putting cheese in this crust.

Quote from Penny

Sheldon: I just wish I could find something that excites me.
Penny: You do understand that crust doesn't normally come with cheese in it?

Quote from Penny

Penny: What got you excited about dark matter in the first place?
Sheldon: Well, I left string theory, which I'd been working on for a long time, and everyone was talking about how cool dark matter was, and I thought, "€œWell, sure, I'll give that a whirl".
Penny: So it's your rebound science?
Sheldon: What's that?
Penny: Well, not the science you spend the rest of your life with, but the one you use to make yourself feel pretty again.

Quote from Penny

Sheldon: Well, if I'm being honest, I never forgot about string theory. It's remarkable. It's the closest we've come to a theory of everything, something even Einstein couldn't figure out.
Penny: Well, if he couldn't figure it out, maybe it's just wrong.
Sheldon: But it's so elegant. I mean, look, [drawing on his white board] string theory posits that the fundamental particles we see in three dimensions are actually strings embedded in multidimensional space-time.
Penny: Interesting. So that would mean ... that [silence] ... Can't do this by myself, buddy.

Quote from Bernadette

[Howard playing keyboard in bed with headphones, making a clacking noise]
Bernadette: What is happening?
Howard: I was trying not to wake you.
Bernadette: Did it work?

Quote from Howard

Howard: I just realized, now that I'm not in the band, I can focus on my own music. You know, go solo.
Bernadette: You said you were taking a break from the band to help with me and the baby.
Howard: Yes, and write an astronaut musical. Picture this. The curtain opens. There's a lone astronaut floating in the inky blackness of space. Maybe wires, maybe fog. I'll let the director figure that out. [playing the keyboard] "I really don't know when I'll run out of oxy gen".

Quote from Howard

Howard: Good news! I'm back in the band!
Raj: So, Bernadette doesn't mind?
Howard: It was her idea!

Quote from Penny

Penny: So it's sort of like a guitar string, but instead of making an actual sound, each vibration is a different particle?
Sheldon: Precisely. And when you express it in 11 dimensions, Einstein's relativity equations pop out. Does that sound like a coincidence?
Penny: It does not.

Quote from Penny

Penny: So, so, did we do it? Did we just solve string theory?
Sheldon: Oh. (laughs) I appreciate your enthusiasm, but this is not the sort of thing we can figure out in a night. People have been stuck on this for decades.
Penny: What, decades? Really? It's-it's a string. How hard can it be? It's straight, it's in a loop, it gets knotted up with other strings.
Sheldon: Well, actually there are no knots in anything greater than four dimensions. Ooh, unless we get around that by considering them as sheets. You know, topologically speaking, that has a lot of interesting possibilities.
Penny: See? How long did that take me, like a minute?

Quote from Penny

Leonard: Thought you were getting us dinner.
Penny: Sorry. I had to stop at Sheldon's and help him solve string theory.
Amy: What?
Penny: Yeah, turns out the answer's knots.
Leonard: That's cute, but you can't have knots in more than four dimensions.
Penny: Mmm ... you can if you consider them sheets. [chuckling] Good night.

Quote from Howard

Howard: What up, my Hebrews and She-brews?!

Quote from Howard

Raj: Toby, today you are a man, and you will face many obstacles in life.
Bert: And some of those obstacles are gonna feel like boulders.
Howard: This first song is about the greatest boulder in the history of cinema.

Quote from Howard

Howard: (singing) Alone in my temple in the middle of Peru, A giant stone ball with nothing to do,
Raj: But if you steal my idol, I will roll right over you
All: Cause I'm six tons of granite, And micaceous schist, Yeah, I'm six tons of granite, And micaceous schist,
Bert: I'm gonna crush you, I'm gonna mush you, You took my idol, I'm homicidal, Gonna roll over you till your brains come out, And your bones will crunch and your blood will spout! I'm not just a rock, baby.
I'm a boulder.
All: Cause I'm six tons of granite, And micaceous schist, Yeah, I'm six tons of granite, And micaceous schist, Yeah, I'm six tons of granite-

Quote from Amy

Penny: I remember telling Jenny Runyon that I would teach her how to flirt with boys if she put my name on her project. I got an "A", she got pregnant.
Amy: Girls like you are why I had to come straight home after school.

Quote from Penny

Penny: Wow, I didn't think anything could top last night's spelling bee, but here comes math.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: Too bad, you guys kill at bar mitzvahs. And other events that people can't leave.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I'm trying to come up with a new approach to dark matter, but people keep distracting me. First, my mother kept answering the phone when I called, even though she knew I was busy. And now you show up with my favorite shape of food - a circle made of triangles served in a square box.