Leonard: Okay, if I go in there and pick something I want to do that she also wants to do, she's gonna think I'm just picking it to make her happy. So I feel like I have to pick something I know she doesn't want to do or she's gonna be disappointed. Right? What do you think?
Amy: Think I've got ice cream in this bag that's starting to melt.

Raj: And, with apologies to Lady Gaga, that's how a star is born.
Howard: Told you he was gonna mention Lady Gaga.
Bernadette: At least he didn't talk about how much he cried during that movie.
Raj: Although, if you haven't seen that movie, you should. I cried so much.

Raj: Well, that's the lecture for today. Uh, let's open it up for questions. Uh- Oh, you! Sir, yes. You have a question?
Howard: Yeah. Actually, I have a two-part question.
Raj: Are you sure? I get the sense it's only one part.
Howard: No, no, it's two. Part one: the new star you were talking about. How long did it take that light to reach Earth? And part two: is it true you plant your friends in the audience to ask questions?
Raj: 46,000 years. And no, I don't plant my friends, because apparently, I don't have any.

Raj: Okay, any other questions? Mm. Not about aliens? [to Bernadette] What?
Bernadette: Do you still want me to ask the one you gave me? 'Cause it kind of feels like we're past that.

Leonard: Um, I picked it. You're the one who told me to stop being such a satisficer all the time.
Sheldon: What? I did not. I just pointed out that you were one. It's what I like best about you. Well, that and those little notes you leave in my lunch.
Amy: I leave those!
Sheldon: Well, that's disappointing. I already know that you heart me. Now I don't know if Leonard does.

Sheldon: Leonard? Um, I have been agonizing over whether or not to say something to you.
Leonard: Aw. Let me help. Don't.

Sheldon: I don't think that you should demand to be in charge of a plasma project.
Leonard: Well, big surprise. You can't stand the idea of me succeeding.
Sheldon: No. I'll be honest. New assertive Leonard is going to take some getting used to. But so did cargo pants Leonard, hmm? Who, for the record, I miss. He always had gum.

Penny: How did it go?
Leonard: Great.
Penny: What, so you got the job?
Leonard: I did not.
Penny: So you quit? Okay, Leonard, I can't move. I just bought a six-month membership to SoulCycle.

Leonard: Well, I-I didn't quit. I said I was going to. I walked out the door and started crying. You know, "Oh, my, God, oh, my God, oh, my God, what'd I do?" And then he called me back in.
Penny: Then he changed his mind?
Leonard: He did not.
Penny: I'm really confused about how to react to this story.
Leonard: President Siebert didn't want to lose me. Even though they couldn't make me a lead investigator on a plasma team, there was an opening for a co-lead on a photon entanglement team. How cool is that?
Penny: You're gonna have to tell me.
Leonard: It's really cool.
Penny: Yay! Oh, I am so happy for you.
Leonard: I almost got what I wanted, and it never would have happened if you hadn't almost believed in me.

Penny: Let's celebrate. What do you want to do?
Leonard: Oh, please don't make me decide another thing.
Penny: Hey, you want to go to SoulCycle with me?
Leonard: Give me a minute, I'll think of something.

Sheldon: Now, I know what You're you're thinking: isn't Broccoli Hulk basically just the Jolly Green Giant?
Amy: That is what I was thinking. Let's never discuss it again.

Amy: Really? Are you hiding from Penny again?
Leonard: No. No, no, no. I-I went to SoulCycle with her, and my legs hurt so bad, I literally can't stand up.
Amy: Sheldon, why don't you keep him company.
Sheldon: All right.Hello, Leonard.
Leonard: Hey.
Sheldon: Have you ever wondered what the Hulk would be like if he were made of sherbet?
Leonard: I give up.
Sheldon: Delicious.

Raj: I know a lot of people have been having fun claiming that I said I found alien life. I want to make it clear that is not what I said. I did say that was one possible explanation. I don't think that's something to mock. Right? It would be arrogant for us to assume that we are alone in the universe. And as scientists, we need to remain open to the possibility that the truth may sound silly or far-fetched. Uh, the round Earth. Germs that cause diseases. Subatomic particles. All these at one time seemed fanciful.
So who's to say what science fiction of today will be the reality of tomorrow? Will there be colonies on Mars? Uh, matter transporters? Perhaps the Loch Ness Monster is real.
Who knows? I'm just saying that the only way science moves forward is to follow the evidence wherever it leads, even if it makes us sound crazy sometimes.

Raj: You guys know that Hemingway had cats with six toes?
Penny: Six toes per foot or six toes total?

Leonard: Actually, 3-D kind of makes me queasy.
Sheldon: No, but we have to see it in 3-D. We saw part one in 3-D, and the 2-D part two is not the part two of the 3-D part one.
Howard: He's got you there, Leonard. Or he doesn't. I don't really care anymore.