Mary Cooper: Raj is it? Still having trouble talking to the ladies? Because you know at our church we have a woman who's an amazing healer. Mainly she does crutch and wheelchair people. But I bet she'd be willing to take a shot at whatever third-world demon is running around inside of you.

Sheldon: (To his spot) Hello, old friend, Daddy's home.

Mrs. Cooper: By His hand we are all
Sheldon: Fed.
Mrs. Cooper: Give us, Lord, our daily
Sheldon: Bread.
Mrs. Cooper: Please know that we are truly
Sheldon: Grateful.
Mrs .Cooper: For every cup and every
Sheldon: Plateful.
Mrs. Cooper: Amen.

Penny: Sheldon, you know, I do understand what you're going through.
Sheldon: Really? Did you just have the Nobel Prize in Waitressing stolen from you?

Mary Cooper: There's no alcohol in this household. Stop talking like that. And lose the hat.

Mary Cooper: Don't tell me prayer doesn't work.

Sheldon: Attention, everyone. I'm Sheldon Cooper. As those of you in the physics department might know, my career trajectory has taken a minor detour.
Barry Kripke: Off a cliff.

Sheldon: Like the proverbial cheese, I stand alone. Even while seated.

Howard: (Southern Accent) If y'all don't mind, I got a hankering for a lone star beer.
Mary: There's no alcohol in this household, stop talking like that, and lose the hat.
Howard: Sorry, I'll take a diet yoo-hoo if you have one.
Mary: You'll take a Coke.

Mary Cooper: If you recall, when you were little we sat right here at this very spot and talked about some of the problems you had getting along with the neighbor kids.
Sheldon: That was different. They were threatened by my intelligence and too stupid to know that's why they hated me.
Mary Cooper: Oh, baby. They knew very well why they hated you.

Sheldon: You see. People have been pointing and laughing at me all morning.
Barry Kripke: Not true. People have been pointing and laughing at you your whole life.

Howard: I can't believe we spent three months in that frozen hell.
Raj: It's like a snowy nightmare from which there's no awakening.

Mary Cooper: Whatever. Jesus still loves you.

Barry Kripke: Yeah, but research in to dark energy proved that Einstein's cosmological constant was right all along. So you're still, surprise surprise, a loser.

Sheldon: My credibility may have been damaged.
Barry Kripke: Completely wrecked.